I Got To Go (Before I Lose My Mind)

You Bring Me Back To Life (And Itʼs All In The Name Of Love)

Summary:
He was ready to love, he was ready to hurt.

Together with Shouto.

But Katsuki supposed, thatʼs just how his life had always treated him. Chasing after things he sometimes found impossible to reach.

✒

Katsuki woke up in fragments. 

He saw flashes of different but familiar places, he knew he had been moved. He wasnʼt fully aware what was happening though. No matter how hard he had tried, he couldnʼt pry his eyes open. When he finally did manage to open his eyes and keep them that way, the lights were dimmed in the room, letting him adjust much faster than he wouldʼve been able to. He looked to the side, spotting the dark sky shining with a million stars through the curtain surrounding his bed.

He tried to flip to his side since his body felt stiff from being in one position for too long. Registering too late that his hand was being gripped by something or someone extremely strong. Glancing down at whoever it was with a scowl already ready on his face, Katsukiʼs expression crumbled at the realization that it was Shouto. The one who had practically dumped him without a proper explanation and then proceeded to act as if nothing was wrong. Also the one who had held Katsukiʼs hands when they shook from pent-up nerves, or ran his fingers gently through his hair because ‘I wanted toʼ.

Katsuki would never deny himself his feelings. Especially regarding the boy in front of him. He knew he loved him like he had loved no other. Katsuki just wasnʼt expecting for it to hurt to think about it now that he knew he could never love Shouto the way he wanted to. Not again. Love was never without its ups and downs, and Katsuki was ready to face them with Shouto, but when the the duo-haired boy hadnʼt even stayed long enough to consider the thought, how could Katsuki ever expect to have his feelings reciprocated like he always tried to deny he wanted from the day he had discovered them?

He was ready to love, he was ready to hurt.

Together with Shouto.

But Katsuki supposed, thatʼs just how his life had always treated him. Chasing after things he sometimes found impossible to reach. If Katsuki believed in God, or perhaps a higher power out there—because there had to be someone out there, right? To be fucking with him so deliberately—he wouldʼve begged for answers as to why the universe seemed to hate him so. Katsuki stared at their hands, the closed space, and couldnʼt help thinking that Shouto still felt so far away, like a chasm had opened between them the night of their break-up, and Katsuki just couldnʼt figure out how to close it, how to mend any of this.

“Bakugou.” The blond nearly jumped out of his skin at the voice, his body tensing immediately, ready for an attack. The expected ‘popʼ of his explosions didnʼt occur, and with a striking emotion of subdued panic, he realized it was just his homeroom teacher. Groaning under his breath, Katsuki glared at Aizawa as he watched his hair flop down and his eyes turn back to their natural shade of black and not the glowing red that came with his Erasing Quirk.

Aizawa raised his eyebrows in a silent challenge, glancing at the sleeping boy in the chair before going back to staring at Katsuki. Feeling slightly defeated, because he wasnʼt that much of an asshole to wake up someone who clearly looked exhausted, Katsuki sat up as much as he could with the grip still evident on his hand and adjusted his pillow. He knew exactly where this conversation was going, and as much as he would rather dig a hole in the ground and bury himself in there to never be found again just to avoid this interaction, Katsuki knew it was better to just get it over with.