Journal entry: June 8, 2023
Today, I lost a friend.
I have noticed that the first question people often ask after hearing the news is about the level of closeness we shared, as if trying to gauge the appropriate amount of sympathy they should offer. But how does one measure the depth of a bond between two friends? How can I explain where our friendship stood?
He was one of those few with whom I could truly be myself – someone I could have fun with and enjoy their company. He was someone who dared to call me out when I was veering off track, someone who was close enough to take the uncomfortable route of bringing me down from my high horse. He could make me the punchline of a joke without making me feel ridiculed. He went beyond the boundaries of social etiquette, joking about me and making me participate so that we could laugh together.
Though he wasn't always around, we had a warm bond – a true friendship. Even though we didn't walk side by side on every path, he wasn't an occasional outsider in our circle. He actively participated and was a part of it, just with a larger circle that included ours. We grew up together, even if we weren't always physically present. His home was just a house away from mine, so no matter where we went, we could always come back home. We may not have witnessed every single moment of each other's growth, but we were there for enough significant moments to never feel like strangers to one another.
Now, I struggle to put my feelings into words. We had embarked on different paths once again, growing apart from each other. There was so much left to witness and share. I wanted him to be a part of the stage I was progressing towards, and I yearned to see the changes he went through. But now, he's no longer here to accompany me on this journey as a friend, exploring new territories together.
He left before we had the chance to meet again.
Now, I find myself torn, unsure of whom to mourn more. Today, I lost a friend – the friend he was and the friend he could have been.
Goodbye, buddy. Although we must part ways for now, I hold onto the hope that we will meet again one day, embracing each other with joyful hearts. May you find eternal peace in the comforting embrace of serenity. Your memory will forever dwell within us, and the bond we shared will be cherished endlessly. There is no doubt that you were an exceptional friend, and the loss of your friendship brings a profound sadness that will linger in our hearts.
