Very Short and Confusing Stories That No One Ever Reads

Story 1: The Chapter in Which Timmy Plants a Tree

    Once upon a time there was a male kid that was four earth years old, named Timmy. He looks similar to someone just like you (but not at the same time. That was only said so you can imagine him). One day while Timmy was planting a tree, randomly a guy named Corn on the Cob Robot Bob appeared, screaming! Then, without noticing Bob, Timmy asked his mom, "When will I be able to play with the tree?"

    His mom opened her mouth to speak, but at that exact moment, a giant robot fell down from the sky in the background and shot the mom with a laser ray. The words that came out of her mouth were, "Tomorrow, honey. Tomorrow." Her head deformed in a way that seemed like it was melting, but then un-melted. When Iooked at again it and one arm was made out of iron. Her eyes were the same as a fly that was mutated to grow the size of a 26 year old human, but red. Her hand took the shape of a plastic grabber toy.

    So Timmy responded, "OK!" The next day, Timmy came back from school. He took one look at the "tree" and complained, "Mommy, it's not big yet!"

    Once again, his mom said, "Tomorrow, honey. Tomorrow," except this time she was a robot with a laser ray arm. So Timmy waited. And waited. And waited and waited and waited for 6 years, and then, finally, on the day he planted it but exactly 6 years later, the tree sprouted like 3 inches out of the ground. Timmy smiled. Then, he heard a sound that sounded like that same giant robot flying through the sky in the background and shooting his little sister that also looks like you (but also not at the same time), Chimmy Changa, through his back door.

    Chimmy burst out of the open door frame. Her head deformed in a way that seemed like it was melting, but then un-melted. When looked at again it and one arm was made out of iron. Her eyes were the same eyes as a fly that was mutated to grow the size of a 2 year old human, but red. Her hand took the shape of a plastic grabber toy. A robotic voice screamed, "TOMORROW, HONEY!!! TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and Chimmy infringed the minuscule tree. Timmy frowned. Then he tripped on a large rock even though he was in his house and not moving.