all mine

~•"im fine"•~

This is very short because I have no motivation

Ever since I have left tsireya I have never felt so alone ever my heart felt like burning for the first few days but now it just empty I haven't eaten or talked alot it's almost like I'm muted without tsireya I was nothing there was no joy in my life she was the only person who could make me feel alive but without her I feel dead,alone , isolated it hurt even more since no one even noticed not one single soul I was always just sitting in my room staring at the wall zoned out I was so tired of this I don't want to do this anymore

If I ever told father he would never understand or even listen while thinking about all sorts of things i zoned out but then I felt a little tap on my shoulder I turned around quickly while wiping my tears

Tuk: brother are you ok?

Lo'ak:I'm ok don't worry about me tuk

Tuk hugs her brother tightly

Tuk: you can tell me

Lo'ak just hugs her back quickly now sobbing into her arms he ended up telling her everything

Tuk stayed quite listening to him she had never seen her brother like this he rarely cries

Tuk: we will see her again someday I promise

Lo'ak:I hope

They stayed in that hug for a long time but a few moments later tuk hears little snores coming from lo'ak he had fallen asleep finally

She lays him down on his bed trying not to wake him up then walks out the door as soon as she shuts the door she sees neteyam and Kiri waiting there

Kiri+neteyam: is he ok?

Tuk: he's fine he just misses tsireya if you knew he wasn't ok why didn't you help him

Neteyam: because he never opens up to me and also he usually wants to be alone so

Tuk: oh well leave him for now he needs to sleep he hasn't slept for a long time he is tired

They all walk back to their rooms

(Few days later)

Lo'ak was sitting on top of a tree his legs dangling down he heard someone climbing up

It was neteyam

Lo'ak: go away

Neteyam: baby bro I'm just here to check on you

Lo'ak: leave me alone neteyam I'm fine

Neteyam: but you don't look fin-

Lo'ak: leave me alone

After that neteyam just left he didn't want to annoy him

After neteyam had left lo'ak started crying again

Lo'ak: what if she doesn't wait for me?
What if she doesn't love me anymore?
What if she forgets who I am?
What if she just moves on and I waited for so long for nothing?

Thoughts like that just kept running through his mind and never leaving

None of this makes sense I know but like I'm so tired so I just be writing anything but it's really crap but deal with it because I didn't want to rewrite it