The Stars

Chapter 2

She is awake and perched on the side of my bed. She looks at me with her big green eyes and whispers "You were mumbling, almost screaming. It didn't wake Ma and Pa, don't worry."

I frown a little, I didn't know I mumbled or screamed, no one ever told me.

With a final glance at me she turns, jumps and pads back to her bed on the other side of the room. I debate moving for less than a second before I am up and moving toward the bathroom.

The hall ways are short and colorful here, but that doesn't make the morning walk any happier.

Once I reach my destination, I look in the mirror. Dull blue eyes, matted blonde hair, dark bags under my eyes and the body of someone who barely eats.

I'm tall, about 5'8 and I have curves, but I don't see any beauty.

I see the ugly hands of loss choking any beauty that has ever existed in me.

I turn on the shower at the hottest setting it gets and I stand and feel the familiar burning sensation that I've come to love and I welcome the numbness that follows.

After I've taken probably three layers of skin off with the burning water, I get out.

I put on black skinny jeans, a white flowing shirt, and a black leather jacket that matches my combat boots.

I have to open my other bag to find my eye liner, I didn't unpack, which seemed to shock Isabel Roberts, the mother here.

She tried to unpack my stuff, but I just packed it back up. I think it upset her that I didn't like her, that I refused to try to like her.

With my eye liner in hand I look back into the mirror and I see what everyone else sees.

Pain, sorrow, misery and self hatred.

I begin to line my eyes in the black color and I watch my eyes go from dull to fierce and I watch them grow.

I am strong now, I tell myself, stronger than ever before.

I can hide behind my appearance and no one will doubt my strength.

I am ready for the first day of school.