Please Help (A Johnnie Guilbert Story)

Chapter 3

*TRIGGER WARNING*

*Johnnie's POV*

I woke up five minutes later, my thighs drenched in blood. I got some toilet paper and wrapped them back up, and ran out to my last hour of the day. I walked in just before the bell rang, and sat down next to Ella, who also had that class.

"Hey, are you okay? You sounded a little hurt when you banged your thigh on the desk..." she said with concern in her voice. I replied with an "I'm okay, don't worry," and she nodded. I pulled out my phone and put one of my headphones in, giving the other one to Ella. Her eyes lit up when I handed it to her.

I think she was growing on me. She seemed like she cared. Like she could actually be a friend. She was the first person to actually seem concerned about me. But she doesn't know me. What I do. If she ever found out, she would leave. Like everyone else has. She wouldn't understand. No one does. I sighed, and worked on whatever it was the teacher had us do.

*Ella's POV*

I was thinking about what was going to happen, what I was going to write in my note. The only person I thought about mentioning in it was Johnnie, even if I had only just met him. He was nicer then anyone ever has been to me. I got out my notebook, and started writing it.

Dear Whoever...

 I've tried. I've tried so hard you don't even know. But I just can't live like this anymore. I can't live anymore. Not with the constant abuse, negligence and hate. I am done. No one has ever helped me. I haven't eaten in weeks. I cut every day. Nobody has noticed.

There is only one person that has been nicer, and I met him today. I just won't live like this anymore. I'm sorry. Goodbye.

I closed my book, and laid my head down. Johnnie did the same a second later, and we stayed like that for the rest of the class. When the bell rung, we walked out together.

"Your mom is okay with you coming over, right?" Johnnie asked. I nodded, and smiled a little. We walked onto the bus, and were soon at his house. I was a nice little thing, very plain.

"Mom! I brought someone over so we could work on a project!" He yelled when we walked in. His mom walked out and introduced herself as Patty. We walked into Johnnie's room, denying the snacks she tried to give us. He walked over to his computer and went onto Pandora, putting on the Pierce The Veil station. I sat on his bed, playing on my phone. He sat down next to me and pulled out his notebook. We worked on the project for a few minutes.

"Ella? What's that?" he asked, his voice shaking. I looked down, and saw that my sleeve had come up a little bit, revealing my cuts. I looked up, tears already welling in my eyes. I pulled my sleeve back down, and looked away.

"It's... Nothing. Don't worry about it, Johnnie," I said, and stood up. "i have to go. Bye," I said. Before I could walk out, I felt him grab my hand. I turned around, and saw him crying. He hugged me, not saying anything. Once I got over the shock of being hugged, I hugged him back and allowed myself to cry into his shirt. We said nothing, just stood there. He pulled me back to the bed.

"Ella... I know how you feel. Please stop it. Please," he pleaded.

"No, Johnnie, you don't. You don't know how I feel. You don't know how it feels to take a blade to your wrist and want to die every day!" I shouted. He looked at me and stood up.

"Johnnie? What are you doing?" I asked. "I need to show you something. I'll be right back," he said, then walked out. He came back a minute later, without a shirt on and wearing shorts. His upper half was covered with a towel. He stood in front of me, took a deep breath, and let the towel fall.

I gasped at his body. His arms were covered in scars and half healed wounds. His entire chest and stomach was covered. He was looking down, crying.

"Johnnie.... How long?" I asked shakily. "Four years. Since my dad... Since my dad died..." he sobbed, and sat back down. Once he calmed down some, he pulled his shorts up, revealing fresh burns and cuts. Really fresh ones. I gasped at how deep some of them were, how many there were.

"Why do you do it, Ella?" he asked. I took a deep breath, and steadied myself.

"I grew up happily. Mom and dad, a sister. When I was seven, my sister died in a car crash... It was all downhill from there. She was my best friend, you know? And she was gone. When I was ten, my dad walked out on my mom and I. Once that happened, mom turned to drugs. She blames me for dad leaving. She started beating me, everyday. I started cutting then. Soon, she got fired, and couldn't make money for her drugs. I walked out of my room one day, and saw her with a man. I didn't know him. He never said anything, he just threw me to the ground. He raped me in front of my mom, and she just sat there laughing. When he was done, he gave my mom money. It started happening more and more. Daily. I wake up every morning to three or more men, waiting for me. My mom, she beats me almost to death if I don't please them. My mom calls me fat. Worthless. Ugly. I've been anorexic for 3 years. I haven't eaten in a week. I was going to kill myself tonight," I said, getting progressively more frantic, sobbing harder then I ever have. Johnnie was looking at me, shocked.

"Ella... I'm so sorry... Nobody deserves that. I've attempted suicide four times in the past two months. I've been anorexic for years. It is so hard," he said. He was rubbing his exposed wrists. "Can I... See yours?" he asked. I nodded and took off my shirt and pulled up the tank top I had on under it. He took my wrists in his hand, and held them.

"You're gonna stay here tonight. I don't want you to go back to her. You can't," he whispered. I nodded, and pulled my shirt back down and put my sweater on over it.

*Johnnie's POV*

I can't believe it. She cuts to. She feels how I feel. She doesn't judge me. I stood her up and walked out to my mom, who is the most accepting, caring person ever. She doesn't judge anyone. Ella stood behind me, looking at the ground as I explained to my mom what was happening.

"I can't believe that bitch. Why would you subject your child to that? You aren't going back to her. I am going to call CPS and you're staying with us, okay?" she said. Ella looked at her, and nodded. "Go on upstairs, were going to get you some clothes later," she said. Ella looked concerned, and tried saying that she didn't need any, but my mom shut her down. I took her back upstairs to my room, where she sat stunned.

"Okay, did that just happen?" she asked. I nodded and smiled. We sat in my room silently, listening to Pierce The Veil.

"Ella! Can you come down here? There's some officers here to talk to you!" My mom yelled. Ella stood up shakily. I gave her a nod, and stood up with her. I held her hand as we walked down to talk to the cops.