Touch Starved (Tomura Shigaraki x Fem!OC)

VI: STARVED

TOMURA'S POV

At first Tomura was suspicious of Gem's intentions with the League, her only demand so simple: a place to stay. But hearing her words, he came to realize she feels just as he does. She spoke with such conviction and passion for real justice, not the self affirming shit heroes spew.  That's why Tomura is so cold. He resents the society that shoved him aside and looked down on him from their pedestal. Living his life with nothing but anger and resentment after no one ever lent him a helping hand. All For One was his only salvation, offering him an avenue to explore this rage and a chance to retaliate. AFO told Tomura the only way to get relief was to show society they made a mistake in looking down on him. He needed to remind them their lives, the fate of the world, lies in his powerful hands. That's all he's ever felt, all he's ever known.

Hearing Gem's heartfelt words against hero society should embolden his anger and drive for destruction. Yet for some reason his heart races around her. At first he was quick to judge himself. His Master's voice in his head telling him he doesn't have time to spare on such trivial emotions. He never allowed himself to be distracted by fantasies or 'could-haves'. But after feeling Gem's healing touch, something new sparked inside him that challenges his way of living. Something new that persists, and that he can't ignore.

Her touch is surprisingly soft for such an intimidating woman. The pain from her stab wound is nothing compared to the way she makes me feel. Her healing energy feel so... nice.

Tomura is unsure what to make of these thoughts, what to make of Gem herself. Everyone's only ever been afraid of him, even so called comrades keep their distance not wanting to risk contact. In combat he remains unscathed at the hand of his all powerful decay. AFO isolating him and feeding him a hateful narrative only drove Tomura further away from any positive emotions at all. A success in AFO's eyes. Gem is the first person to touch him in what feels like... well, ever. And she doesn't just touch him, it's gentle and intentional. On top of that, he couldn't help but feel turned on the first time he witnessed her bloodlust. Her sarcasm and conviction get replaced with blushes and a relaxed face. It made Tomura realize in a way she is just like him. A soft heart buried in anger and pain.

This time it was him lost in thought with Gem's words cutting into his fantasy, "I'll leave you to rest. Even though I healed you, it does take it's toll on your energy levels."

She's already walking out the door before I can say anything. I've never been good at saying what's on my mind. But... nothing's ever been on my mind except absolute rage. Now I find myself, what, caring? About some random girl? This is so gross....

Alone again he festers. Unbeknownst to him, with Gem in his room he was subconsciously monitoring his hands - keeping them away from her. For reasons he didn't understand in this moment, he felt terrified of her decaying at his touch.

These thoughts are so stupid. I should sleep. I should be preparing for war. I should be numb and angry and consumed with hatred.

Tomura's ranting in his head grows darker. Unintentionally he starts to fantasize about using his hands for something other than destruction.

I can't stop thinking about her. I haven't stopped since she rushed me with that knife. I had ample time to react and turn her body into ash but the way she looked at me... She's so soft, touching me gently, as if she's the one afraid to hurt me. I want to grab her by the neck and pull her close. I want to go to sleep with her, to wrap my arms around her and feel something. I am tired of feeling tired, numb. This woman I don't even know is... whatever. How did I let this happen...

And when did I start touching myself? It's her. It's... it's her touch. I spent my whole life void of real touch, familiar only with decay and anger. But I want to touch her with... not anger. Fuck I don't know. But I think it would feel good. To grab her hips, her ass, her thighs. God her thighs. Sitting on that barstool in her little black dresses that show her curves off so well. Thighs squished over the tiny seat, thick and inviting. I want to be in between them, I want what's in between them. I'm throbbing for her. I bet she feels so warm. I bet she's the type to squirm. After all, she blushes so easily. At blood of all things, that's so fucked up. It's so hot. I want to make her squirm, make her blush.

Tomura falls asleep thinking sweet deranged thoughts. For the first time he lets himself indulge in the fantasy of connection.