Her Story: October Ivory

2

            I entered the lunch room and got in line. It was very loud in here but it didn't really bother me. I people watched while I waited to get my tray. Everyone seemed to have a clique while I was just... there. That's how it's always been though.

             I get nuggets and then sit at an empty end of a table. I saw that girl from earlier on the other end of the room. Her name's Lee. That's what I here people calling her. She was sitting on the table talking to the people occupying it. They all knew how to dress just like her and they were really outgoing.

            "And who are you staring at?" Nyana asked, blocking my view. I look up at her before looking down at my tray.

            "No one."

            She was one of the people who told me I should get a new phone and she always picked on me because I wore a uniform. She sat in front of me. "Give me your nuggets."

            I reluctantly do so. I didn't know when's the next time I would eat since it's not really good at home but I didn't want to risk getting punched in the face by her.

           She stayed sitting across from me, eating my food for the remainder of my lunch hour and by the time it was over, my stomach was growling.

           After school I went to the bus lane to find my bus.

          "October!" My head snapped to the student's parking lot." A girl I didn't know was waving me over. She dressed like me and was in a crowd of people. I swallowed hard and hesitantly went over to her. The closer I got, the more familiar all of the faces got, it was Nyana, Lee and then some others I've seen around school. But the girl who called my name I've never seen before.

             "Yes?" I respond.

              "Wassup wit'chu? What'chu got goin' on?"

             I was confused as to why she was asking me this. "Umm, just tryna get home."

           She nods. "Cool." I look over at Lee and she was just staring at me with slight disgust. "Wassup with the clothes though?" The girl asks, making me redirect my attention to her.

          "O-Oh. This the only clothes I got. I got navy blue school pants too. And red and white uniform button ups."

             They all looked at me weirdly but her. She just smiled a little, it kinda creeped me out.

           "I have to go now. My bus is probably here."

            "They not finna leave yet. Stay a lil longer."

            "Okay..."

            "I heard you smart. You know how ta do math?"

              "Yes."

             "You ca' do mine?"

              I nod.

           "How much?"

           "Thirty."

             "Bet." She takes off her book bag and grabs the paper from her folder. "Gotta be done by tomorrow."

            "Okay." I take it and put it in my book bag.

             "One more thing."

             "Yes?" She looks down at her shoes and I do to before looking up at her again.

             "Tie my shoe real quick."

               I internally sigh before bending down to do so. I heard some of them snickering but I ignored it before standing up.

            "Preciate it—" I heard the buses pulling off and snapped my head towards them. No! "Oops," the girl said nonchalantly. "My bad."

           "It's okay," I mumble. I notice a car behind them. "Can you give me—"

           "I ain't got enough gas fa all that."

            "Oh...alright. Bye then." I walk away, stuffing my hand in my pockets and on que, it starts to rain. I groan and call my mom. She answers on the last ring. "Hey, can you come pick me up?"

          "How the hell you miss the bus October?!" She yelled and I wince.

          "I-I was talking—"

            "For what?! You know you supposed to be lookin' for yo damn bus not chattin' wit' these kids. Start walkin' cause I ain't pickin' you up."

           "Yes ma'am." The line died and I sighed, stuffing the phone back in my pocket. I rushed home as the rain poured down on me. I was soaked when I stepped through the door. I took off my book bag, jacket and shoes, mom looking at me from the living room. "Hi," I greet her.

               "Go take a damn bath. Now I gotta wash your clothes again."

                 The little happiness I tried to maintain left my being and I went upstairs to do as told. I stared at myself in the mirror. I thought I was ugly. I had a baby face with dark brown eyes and chubby cheeks. I also had a permanent burn mark on my forehead from when a hairdresser accidentally burnt me with a flat iron as a kid. After I showered, I went back downstairs and to the kitchen. I looked in the cabinets and noticed the peanut butter and jelly mix. It was new so I knew she went to the store today. I got the bread down and then made me a sand which. 

           I also made a glass of milk and then went to the living room. As much as my mom seemed to hate me, I still tried to have conversations with her, which failed all the time. When I sat down, she glared at me.

              "I know you didn't open my new jar of fuckin' PB & J."

               I looked at the sand which and then her, feeling like an 8-year-old who was about to get in trouble. "...I thought I could eat because you let me last time."

             "I don't give a damn what I did last time! Give me my fuckin' shit." I stood back up and walked over to her, handing her the plate which she snatched. "And the milk." I hand it over. "Go to ya room and do ya fuckin' homework. Bye."

              I went back upstairs and gently closed my door before sitting on my blow up mattress. I didn't have any homework so I took out the girl's work and started on it. As I did it, I couldn't help but tear up. My life sucked. A tear slipped from my eyes and fell onto her paper. I started freaking out a little, trying to rub it dry but that was a stupid idea because it ripped that part of the paper.

            That night I cried myself to sleep, wishing my mom loved me, or anybody for that matter.