Dear, Him.

Get out of my head

This time, I will gather the courage to approach you. When I see you, I will confidently greet you with a cheerful "good morning" and ask if you're available later tonight for a small meeting. (Though in reality, it's a date.) I mean, surely you'll have the time to spare, right? I'll finally have the opportunity to see you up close. I imagine you'll say yes with a smile, and from that moment on, I will eagerly count down the hours and minutes until we can finally have a conversation. This time, you'll be sitting right in front of me, at the same table, closer than ever before. You will say yes... won't you? As I anxiously thinking about your response, my right leg involuntarily shakes, unintentionally disrupting the study session taking place in the classroom.

"Ms. Ayumi, please quiet down. Are you alright? You're distracting the session," the teacher spoke in a calm but firm tone.

"I'm truly sorry. I'll try to slow down," I replied, my gaze fixed on my book. However, focusing on the words seemed impossible. How could I concentrate when thoughts of you consumed my mind? Every paragraph lost its meaning as your name, your hair, your walk, your smile, and your eyes replaced the words. It became increasingly challenging to comprehend the sentences before me. You were all I could think about.

I imagined you sitting in your classroom at this very moment, engrossed in an algebra lesson, as you were only in your second year. I pictured your frustrated expression while grappling with problems involving 'x's and 'y's, occasionally showing a hint of frustration. A quiet giggle escaped my lips at the thought of how cute you must look. I couldn't wait to see you in front of the library later. As the class continued, I struggled to regain my focus, my mind constantly drifting back to thoughts of you. The teacher's words became a distant murmur as I daydreamed about our upcoming encounter.

You, you, you....

Finally, the bell rang, signaling the end of the class. I hastily packed my books, my heart racing with anticipation. With each step towards the library, I could feel the excitement building within me. The thought of seeing you face-to-face, finally being in your presence, was both exhilarating and nerve-wracking. I can only hope that you would be there, standing by the entrance, engrossed in the book you always read.

And there you were. Your presence alone seemed to radiate a captivating aura. You seem to have a strong affinity for libraries, don't you? I can imagine that they could potentially become our preferred locations for future dates. However, I don't mind at all—I absolutely adore the atmosphere they provide. Just being there with you, in the peaceful ambiance of a library, is more than sufficient for me.
This is it..! I yelped in my mind.

Summoning every ounce of courage, I approached you with a mixture of excitement and apprehension. "Hey," I greeted, my voice filled with a blend of nervousness and anticipation. You looked up from your book, startled but intrigued. A warm smile graced your lips as our eyes met. You were in your blue uniform, your tie slightly wrinkled, and your hair appearing a bit messy. Yet, in my eyes, it looked delightfully fluffy. Perhaps it was a minor case of a bad hair day, I pondered. "Hi," you responded, your voice carrying a hint of curiosity.
In that moment, everything around us seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of us in our own little world. The library transformed into a place of endless possibilities, where our stories intertwined.

My mind began wandering as I searched for the right words to say to you. "Um, hey... I actually wanted to talk to you about something," I stammered, pausing briefly. As our eyes locked, i swear i could see a spark, a flicker of connection igniting in your shining black eyes. Adjusting your glasses, an expression of puzzlement etched on your face as you directed your gaze towards me.
"Uh, sure. But I'm in a hurry now. Is it alright if we meet during the silent hour of the prep class tonight? I'll be at the library i guess," you responded, with a small smile on your face.
"Oh, i know-," I paused, catching myself just in time before uttering a sentence that could potentially frighten you away. I realized that it wasn't the right moment to reveal such intense feelings, at least not yet. But in the depths of my heart, a burst of joy overcame me, and I couldn't help but let out a joyful yelp. Internally, I screamed with excitement, repeating "Yes! Yes! Yes!" in celebration.

I'm guessing you could tell, as you gave me a perplexed yet intriguing look before returning your attention to your book. With a small smirk on your face, you spoke, "Well, see you later, i guess, Hazel." Then, you proceeded to make your way into the entrance of the library, leaving me standing there, captivated by thoughts of your delightfully fluffy hair and your seemingly huggable figure.

"....Hazel." He called me by my first name. A surge of anticipation washed over me. I couldn't help but wonder if this small gesture indicated that we were gradually growing closer. It felt like a significant step in our connection, a sign that he was becoming more familiar with me on a personal level. The thought filled me with hope and excitement, leaving me eager to see where our relationship would lead.

I love you.