Loneliness is a powerful thing.
The thing about it is that it can hit you even when you're with people. Even when you're supposed to not feel lonely. It's a burning feeling that leaves you so utterly cold.
Hitomi was super appreciative of all her friends, even Gojo, but there was nothing that could stop her from feeling an odd sort of disconnect with them lately. It felt as though she was just floating from place to place, even though she was standing on solid ground surrounded by very real people.
If she was to be honest, Hitomi didn't really know what she was feeling. Any inch of sadness she felt towards her father was long gone; if anything, she was not going to be missing him at all. Eventually, he got what he deserved. Karma came back to bite him. But that wouldn't solve her current dilemma.
And as long as her emotions were a mess, her cursed energy was going to fluctuate. In fact, it probably was fluctuating. At least her classmates had the decency to keep their mouth shut about it. But December came and yet, Hitomi could not change a thing about how she was feeling.
Emotions were really such a complicated thing.
She turned over on her bed, burying her face into the pillow. She wished she could just sleep forever.
'Isn't that just dying?' Izuki suddenly popped up. He had appeared sometimes, rambling about stories from a thousand years; which had been a welcome distraction. 'Do you want to die then? That's not such a fun thing. Take it from me.'
'You know that's not what I meant, right?' Hitomi almost wished Izuki existed in solid form, then she could at least punch him. Lightly that is. 'I just want to be able to rest and get my stupid fucking emotions back in order so that I stop messing up missions.'
'I can try to –'
'Absolutely not, Izuki. I can't have your emotions mixing up with mine. It will make a worse mess.'
'Whatever you say, Hitomi. And I'm sure you've probably forgotten about this, but tomorrow is Gojo's birthday. Don't forget to give him his present.'
'I did not forget about it,' Hitomi answered with the smallest of pouts. 'You know how I have been lately and on top of that, I have to go on a mission early tomorrow, so you know. There's a lot of things on my mind.'
'I know, but a birthday party would be the perfect way for you to relax,' Izuki answered. 'You can always ditch the mission. Just think about it, okay?'
Yeah, she would definitely think about it. (Not)
YOU ARE READING
YOUNG GODS ━━ gojo satoru
FanficAYASE HITOMI is born in a cruel world and has suffered for it; but dealing with it becomes easy with her friends at her side, especially with the annoying, powerful brat, GOJO SATORU on her side. *** gojo satoru x oc jujutsu kaisen manga (+anime)...