My name is Craig Tucker
Last week was my birthday
My Grandma gave me a check for 100 dollars
I was so happy
But then 4 kids from school came to my house
And said I should use my 100 dollars to invest in becoming a Peruvian Flute Band
They promised I would double my money in one afternoon
But the government arrested us
Along with all the other Peruvian Flute Bands
And took us to an internal camp in Miami
We begged to go home
But Instead the government told us they were sending us to Peru
And so that is why I am now in Peru
If I die let it be known that it is because 4 guys I don't even like from school lied to me and took my birthday money
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