A Heart's Desire - Book 1 of the Crossing Midian Series - A Christian Romance

Chapter 18

Sleep didn't come easy for Wesley that night. In fact, sleep didn't come at all. After he had talked with his mom, Wesley had gone upstairs to talk to Tommy, but he found the boy already asleep. He lay on his stomach with his head turned to the wall, but Wesley could still see that he'd been crying. His face was tear stained and his cheeks were red.

Beau lay beside him, nestled against Tommy's side, and Wesley knew that Tommy no doubt took comfort in Beau being there. Even if he would never admit it.

Instead of going to his room, Wesley made his way out to the barn and up to the loft 'clubhouse' that the boys spent so much time in. He didn't really want to risk having to talk to anyone else, and he figured the loft was as good a place as any to hide out.

"I'm not hiding," He thought to himself, even as he lay down on the old sofa that he and his brothers had brought up there a couple summers ago. "I'm just waiting. Eventually, everyone will calm down and it'll all be okay." He knew he would have to talk to his dad at some point, but not tonight.

So began a long night of tossing and turning on an old, musty smelling couch that creaked every time he moved. No matter how hard he tried, Wesley couldn't stop replaying the scene that had taken place that night. The look on his mother's face when he'd told her he'd already enlisted. How upset Tommy was at him. The way his dad had turned away from him, not even able to look at him. Coop's jeep driving back down the driveway after their fight.

And Anna.

It always came back to Anna.

He tried praying, but it seemed to Wesley that his prayers didn't even reach the rafters of the barn, let alone make it to God's own ears. Wesley wasn't even sure what he was praying for! He stood by his decision to join the Marines. As soon as he'd really thought about it, he knew that was what he wanted to do. While talking to the recruiter that day in August, it had all seemed so simple. He had come up with a plan. Enlisting would not only get him a job so that he could support himself, but it would also be a way to give back. To serve. To have a purpose.

His dad had been a Marine. What was so wrong with Wesley being one too?

These questions and more plagued Wesley's mind as he tried to get even a few hours of sleep, but as the early morning sunlight drifted in through the open loft window, he accepted that no answers would come that night.

And as he was about to get up and head back to the house, he heard the now familiar sound of boots climbing up the steps.

Wesley sat up and looked over at the entrance to the loft to see James walking his way.

"Dad, you shouldn't be climbing up here. You're supposed to be resting, not putting more strain on yourself."

James grunted before stopping in front of his oldest. "Yeah, well, you shouldn't be joining the Marines, either."

Wesley sighed and looked up at him through dark hair that fell in front of his eyes.

"You know you'll have to cut that, right?" James said, pointing towards Wesley's irritatingly long hair.

Wesley resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "Yeah, I know."

James tapped Wesley's knee and said, "Move over. Your poor old dad is tired."

Wesley smirked and moved to sit on the arm of the couch while James sat on the actual seat. Wesley turned so that his feet were on the couch cushion, but he stared out and away from his dad.

For a few minutes, neither man spoke. Until finally, Wesley could handle the silence and waiting no longer and blurted out, "I don't get why you're so mad about this. You served. You got drafted into Vietnam, dad! And by joining, I can get good benefits like housing, and college. I can—"