Same World, Same Princess, Different Path [WMMAP]

Chapter 37 ~ The Sovereign's Indulgence

"What are you so concerned about right now?" Athanasia asked Carsein as they had just left the Emperor's bedroom. The latter looked lost in thought, and she didn't know why. "If this is about the approaching war, His Majesty has given us his consent. I'm handling everything from now on so-"

"My mother wants me home."

Athanasia stopped in her tracks, very surprised. "What does that mean? Does she want you to visit them or stay there permanently?"

He delayed the answer for a few moments. "She wants me to make a choice."

Athanasia understood very easily. "Them or me." The crimson-haired guard nodded. The princess then resumed walking and seemed to think for a moment, her hand on her chin. "I totally understand her." Before Carsein could rebut, she continued. "From what you've told me in the past, you know that your mother carries at least some love for you, right? With everything that's going to happen, the war and the conflicts... Your life will be in danger with me, Carsein. Isn't it logical for a mother to want to protect her child?"

Carsein wanted to reply that he didn't care, but for some reason those words stuck in his throat. Perhaps because it was all wrong and he actually did? "If I use logic, I would even encourage you to go back. You haven't been back there since you became my personal guard. Weren't you close to Aristia's father? And as for your friend, was his name Allendis-"

"I already know all that, Athanasia." He replied with a dry tone. He placed himself in front of the princess so as to block her path. "I rather feel like you've been taking me way too lightly lately."

Athanasia widened her eyes, surprised by his commanding tone. As she looked closer at Carsein, she realized that she had just angered him, which was actually the first time it happened. He had already lost his cool before, but never against her. "It's not that at all. I just think it would be better if you took some time for yourself-"

"On the eve of an upcoming bloody war? Really? You really think that low of me, huh?" His eyebrows were now furrowed and sorrow joined anger in his eyes. He didn't even let her finish answering. "Athanasia, just because I play the dumb kid every day doesn't mean I'm just a fragile child. I'm already 20, I know how to take care of my emotions and what I need. Besides, you're the one I committed to almost 4 years ago, you're the one I'll protect with my life until the end." His tone was resolute now, so he put his hands on Athanasia's shoulders to make sure she heard him. "But lately, I feel like you're trying to push me aside. Are you afraid I'm not strong enough to protect you? I know I'm not as strong in magic as Lucas, I'm not as powerful with a sword as Sir Robane, and I'm sure you're far superior to me in terms of power. But is it too much to ask you to trust me?"

Everything he had just said took her breath away. She didn't even know what to say to him at that moment. Had she become so distant with him in the last few months? She knew she was a shadow of her former self after Lilian's death. But she hadn't realized how the others around them would take it. Yes, she tried and tried to make some distance with them, to be sure to not be hurt as much as before. But it didn't mean that she didn't trust them anymore. Or maybe was it the case?

"I..." She wanted to tell him that she didn't see him as a nobody, that he was her friend, that she just wanted to protect him. But as if to show how much he could understand her, he anticipated her.

He knelt down in front of her on one knee and took one of her hands with his own. "I know what you're trying to do and I don't want your pity. I've told you before, you are the one I will protect to death and I don't regret my choice. I always knew you were a special person, from the first time we met. Why do you think Lady Lilian and I chose the immortal flower as the symbol on your sword?"