Queen of the Broken-hearted

Guy friends

Kenna's the name incase you forgot. Let's start the real journey of love and heartbreak through the years. Like I said at the beginning, we all have our first loves. Some of them end up being our forever and some of them are a name on a list in the back of our mind of all the great guys or douches we fell for. I have been through tons of heartbreak and wether it's your first or your giving up I'll walk through it with you. The first thing to know is even if you are scared of losing a friendship or someone you think you can't live without it'll be okay. I have lost both and it hurts like a third degree burn but over time it heals and you find new people that are better or sometimes worse than the ones before. My first guy friend was Ash, he was the kindest guy at first he felt like a brother someone I could always trust and count on until one day a flip switched and he was a total jerk. He got a girl who wasn't skinny skinny but not fat she was athletic and one of my closer friends until he called me self-centered and tried to get me into some weird things like I'm good. Sometimes those we feel closest to are the people we need to lose to grow and gain confidence from. I no longer speak or see him, now I'm not saying everyday is bliss no ma'am but my confidence is strengthening because of friends like John, Grant, Ty, and Henry who all have my back and are breaking me out of habits that he placed there. Some friends are always gonna be there and these four guys I honestly feel are never gonna leave find guys like John, who get upset when they see you're troubled but refuse to let you wallow in self pity or self hatred and even if you won't talk will still encourage you. Find your Grant who won't let you lie about what's really wrong who you can talk to about anything and will just listen unless you ask for advice. Find your Ty, the one who messes with you but in an sibling fashion but also knows you and pushes you to be your best but also keeps you grounded and away from over analyzing/ being overly dramatic over things. And lastly find your Henry, the one who makes you laugh and threaten as to hurt anyone who mistreats you because they also know your worth and never want you to be disgusted or disappointed in yourself because they see how amazing you are everyday. Now I'm not saying everything's blissful all the time that's pretty much impossible you're gonna butt heads and have different opinions and feelings about things and that's okay! Just remember they're your friends and they should respect you if they don't they don't deserve you. One thing that's always hard when you fall for your friend is being scared of them running away and you losing a close person. I went through this is middle school we had a lot of the same interests, classes, our mom's where good friends, I started liking him in eighth grade but didn't tell him til freshman year, third quarter of the first football game of the season and I haven't really spoken to him since which really hurt and I missed him so much and sometimes I still do, but you know what? It's okay. Even when you ruin a friendship others come along some of them are completely different others are almost exactly the same. Sometimes you get lucky and fall for a friend and even though they don't feel the same way, the friendship stays in place, John and I as well as Henry and I have been through this. Both very mild cases which I will explain: John: I have known him for a year and five months, we've become close in the last I don't know maybe six months. We all work together (John, Ty, Grant, and Henry) John and I started working more shifts together talking more and slowly became friends I gained feeling after the first month or so of truly knowing him, just recently he has found a girl and has really fallen for her I was supportive and happy as any friend should be until Ty told me I should still tell him how I feel for closure, for myself. I at  first was like, no that's stupid I'm gonna lose him like I did Carl and I'm not ready for that. Well Ty kept pressuring me and pressuring me until I broke, I told him and guess what? We are still friends mature men won't let a differentiation in feelings effect what truly matters which is what you all mean to one another. The other example, Henry. Now Henry I have known and liked him since my first day, the second week of my job I found out he has a long term girlfriend like three year long relationship. Now I back off again I respect him and his relationship with this girl we'll call her Marcy. I have never met Marcy nor do I need to. Henry likes her, he trusts and loves her if anything changes I will hunt her down which he knows and he also knows that I used to like him a year ago.  Honesty is always good. If you know them, tell them the truth the worst thing that will happen is pain which is terrible and scary but sooooo worth it to find someone in your life that I have found. Everyone wants companionship and sometimes friends whether it's girl friends or guy friends or both we just need people I have one really close girl friend and her name is Lauren and oh my goodness she is AMAZING! We have similar opinions and personalities but also so different we keep each other grounded and call each other on our crap that's what every friend you have should do. Is keep you from going all psycho and don't get me wrong we've both have had a few calls we all do, we lose our temper we go on a sugar rush we all know what I'm talking about.  Guy friends are good for building trust with men and being more comfortable around them if you've had rough childhood memories with men. It also gives you a better understanding of how to read their minds but also how idiotic they are. You could even have one great guy friend or multiple whatever is best for you is what you should do. Girl you got this!