Resilience

1

.... The way the day will always break, and the night will always fall, I will always love you.
- mama.

FEMI

Those were mama's last words and I could hear them even with the thundering of the thunder and the tears of the rain.

The doctor had said that nothing could be done, she would eventually pass away but nothing prepared me for the pain as I sat next to her.

I still remember how I brushed some hair away from her face, waiting for a reaction,a blink or a sigh but her eyes remained closed as if she was sleeping. Only her slumber was one in which she could not be awoken.

I remember looking at her glistening dark skin and considered how in pity it was to be wasted. I remember brushing my hand against my own skin and wishing it was as dark as hers,Because when most people saw us together, they never believed I was her daughter. Because she was dark, I was brown. She was tall, I was not. So much difference in our features, that everyone had to admit maybe I looked like my father.

Father a word I said only in my subconscious. Father came to be something associated with money.Anytime a new toy came in, mom told me it was from father. Anytime my school fees was being paid, it was from father. One time I had asked her, why I had never seen his face and she replied, she did not lie. He had a wife and daughter but he loved us very much.

I remember how I watched mom whenever she saw women walking or chatting with their husbands and all she had was a child, who was a reminder of the man she was trying hard to erase. At times I thought, she loathed me, but she never did.

And I remember how she had said so casually, " Baby can you look outside and count the stars?" and how I had reminded her there would be no stars tonight, because of the rain.

Then she said " no matter how heavy the rain falls baby,there  will always be a new day. A new beginning." and when I realized, she was suddenly looking pale I begged her to stay with me.

"Just the way the day will always break and the night will always fall. I will always love you." she whispered and closed her eyes smiling.

That was when the doctor's threat became a reality. There was no goodbye, no time for me to tell her how much I loved her. Just this feeling of emptiness.

The very next morning. My "father" arrived. I looked more like him than I'd like to admit. If he noticed any resemblance in our physiques however, he made no show of it. He did not come to show how deeply sorry he was for abandoning mama. He did not even smile or try to mend somehow the years we spent apart. He stormed into the parlor with five men who wore black suits and shades.

He searched the faces, till his eyes finally met mine. At that moment I was exhausted from crying, I looked at him with red eyes, searching for anything. Hope? Instead he said with one word,

"Get dressed. You're leaving for Royals academy this instant."

Was he joking? Was my mother's life so insignificant that it meant nothing to him.

"Babatunde why you go talk like that? Can't you see the girl is still in shock?" One of my mother's sisters thundered from the kitchen where she was making Akamu for her baby.

For the six years that mama was sick, she had only visited twice and she made no effort to help pay for her operation even though according to mama she was "swimming in money.

Father arranged the red cap hanging loosely on his head before saying, "Onome I did not call you in this matter. Mind your business."

"Mind my business?" My aunty asked banging her fist against the kitchen counter which made her baby cry.

"Mind my business?After you have killed my sister you want to kill me too?" She shouted walking to the parlor.

My mom's eldest sister Tejiri warned from her seat where she was conveniently peeling orange, "Onome. Let him be."

Aunty Onome hissed and stormed back to the kitchen.

"Go to your room and get your things. You have six minutes." Father commanded signaling to one of his goons who walked next to me.

I wiped the dried tears in my eyes and waited for at least one of my mother's four sisters to fight for me, but they remained silent.

Even aunty Onome that was shouting, peeped from the kitchen without a word.

I did not know where I got my courage from, "No."

"No?" Father asked with a chuckle.

I was facing the ground and by the time, I looked up he was standing next to me.

"Is that what your mother taught you? She taught you how to disrespect your elders. Like mother like daughter."

At that moment, I stood at full height and stared at him eyeball to eyeball.

" Don't you ever talk about my mother that way again!"

The iron cup my Aunty Mineh was holding dropped from her hands with a loud clatter,her mouth agape.

"Do you even care that my mom is dead? Could you have said anything soothing about this woman who spent her whole life wishing you'd come back her to someday? If you think I'm going anywhere with you, then you'd better stop thinking. You lost the right to command me many years ago."

I ignored the surprised faces by neighbors who had come to cry with me, and I made to walk out the room.

I was pushed backwards by so much force, I fell face flat on the ground.

"Okorebe!( you Dey crace)"Someone thundered ...........

P-S this is my story.

Her resilience
#peek of the past