A Cringy, Cheesy, Cliché

Chapter 1

         English is my least favorite subject in the invention of studies. A whole course curated on how to perfect your already knowledgeable English into analyzing the minute nuances of adverbs and grammar. Science: observe the differences between the natural and material world. History: witness the development of man. And even math ultimately teaches you how to read a paycheck.

         So while I am in my required English class for graduation, you can only imagine my pure and utter hatred I have for when Ms. Chapman announces a summative writing assignment.

         "Now some of you guys really need this grade and I believe it'll be beneficial if you start brainstorming right now."

         I look around for assurance that I am not the only groaning teen here and sure enough an ensemble of seventeen and eighteen-year-olds are side-eyeing Ms. Chapman's dispatch.

         She takes a deep breath before reattempting the remainder of her announcement. "I get that summer is in no less than 4 weeks, but it's really easy guys! Just write me a 300-word short story about highschool sweethearts."

         What a joke. Other than English, love is my least favorite feeling to exhibit. I take a look around to see who else believes this is the stupidest assignment to ever have been issued and sure enough—

         "I'll start right now!" the red head next to me erupts.

         Another kid scoffs before saying, "I've been already working on my final Harry x Y/N draft since forever."

         When I get out of class, I regroup with my two friends, Dani and Freddie, and tell them about the events that unfolded in Chapman's class. I'm not surprised that they find amusement out of my situation and crack a small smile to their exuberant laughter.

         "Our poor Hadley," Freddie mocks.

         Dani sniffles along with her. "How unfortunate that you get stuck with the easiest English teacher of Pacman Prep and your final assignment is giving her a YA paper."

         I roll my eyes at their sarcasm. My lovebird friends just don't get it. While they are in a happily committed relationship, I am a misophilist. Nobody wants me, but that's okay because I don't want anybody either. The school is flooded with wannabe bad boys whose only offense is smoking in the bathroom, players finessing girls out of their panties, and nice guys, who let's be honest, finish last.

         "Okay Hads, how 'bout you use me and Dani as figures for Chapman's essay?" Freddie suggests.

         I consider it for a moment, but ultimately decided that homosexuality doesn't sell and people tend to gravitate to a hetero couple. I mean, just look at the book sales statistics.

         "Believe when I say I am an ally guys—"

         Freddie finishes my thought. "But queer literature is problematic and cis-gender straight couples are the better option."

         "Well you stole the words right out of my mouth, though I'm sure there are people who would love to hear about your lesbian antics, maybe not my class."

         I'm about to change the topic and ask how their classes are going before Dani looks at me as if an animated light bulb is floating above her head.

         "That's it!" she squeals. "Silas Black."

         Silas Black is just about your hottest kid here at Pacman Prep and any girl with two working eyeballs can see that. With shoulders as broad as his dating history, hair darker than his secrets, and lips both full and pink. And though I've never seen Silas Black up close, I've heard that he has a murder of crows tattooed on his collarbone kept well hidden behind his button-up. So at the mention of his name I coolly ask, "What about him?"

         Dani shakes her head at my slow processing. "Use Silas Black as your highschool sweetheart role model."

         Now it's my turn to shake my head. "Babe, I don't talk to the guy, like the guy, or hell, even know  the guy!"

         As if we're all taking turns to each shake our heads, Freddie goes up next. "I don't know Hads, it's a pretty good idea. There's no bigger heartthrob in this school than Silas Black. Why don't you just give it a chance and ask Silas?"

         I weigh my options and decide between a girls-love, a no-love, and an ideal-love, Silas Black has the highest chance of giving me an "A".