TAEKOOK Under the NEW MOON [Taekook FF]

19 | Down At the Corners

Each time that I opened my eyes to the morning light and realized I'd lived through another night was a surprise to me. After the surprise wore off, my heart would start to race and my palms would sweat; I couldn't really breathe again until I'd gotten up and ascertained that Jaewoo had survived as well.

I could tell he was worried—watching me jump at any loud sound, or my face suddenly go white for no reason that he could see. From the questions he asked now and then, he seemed to blame the change on Minghyu's continued absence.

The terror that was always foremost in my thoughts usually distracted me from the fact that another week had passed, and Minghyu still hadn't called me. But when I was able to concentrate on my normal life—if my life was really ever normal—this upset me.

I missed him horribly.

It had been bad enough to be alone before I was scared silly. Now, more than ever, I yearned for his carefree laugh and his infectious grin. I needed the safe sanity of his homemade garage and his warm hand around my cold fingers.

I'd half expected him to call on Monday. If there had been some progress with Scoups, wouldn't he want to report it? I wanted to believe that it was worry for his friend that was occupying all his time, not that he was just giving up on me.

I called him Tuesday, but no one answered. Were the phone lines still having problems? Or was Minho screening my calls? And what about their cell phones. It was ridiculous to think that the cell towers and the physical home phone lines were down. At the same time.

And what about their internet? I had messaged him on TikTok, Instagram, and Snapchat. I got nothing back in return.

On Wednesday I called every half hour until after eleven at night, desperate to hear the warmth of Minghyu's voice.

Thursday I sat in my truck in front of my house—with the locks pushed down—keys in hand, for a solid hour. I was arguing with myself, trying to justify a quick trip to La Push, but I couldn't do it.

I knew that Laurent had gone back to Jennie by now. If I went to La Push, I took the chance of leading one of them there. What if they caught up to me when Minghyu was nearby? As much as it hurt me, I knew it was better for Minghyu that he was avoiding me. Safer for him.

It was bad enough that I couldn't figure out a way to keep Jaewoo safe. Nighttime was the most likely time that they would come looking for me, and what could I say to get Jaewoo out of the house? If I told him the truth, he'd have me locked up in a rubber room somewhere. I would have endured that—welcomed it, even—if it could have kept him safe. But Jennie would still come to his house first, looking for me. Maybe, if she found me here, that would be enough for her. Maybe she would just leave when she was done with me.

So I couldn't run away. Even if I could, where would I go? To Eun? I shuddered at the thought of dragging my lethal shadows into my mother's safe, sunny world. I would never endanger her that way.