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★ #16 | tired "hey, just letting you know that i'm a bit tired of everything."
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ nicole's radio station is now playing...
tired • beabadoobee "maybe it's time to say goodbye, cause i'm getting pretty fucking tired."
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THE autumn morning was filled with the quiet sound of coffee brewing as the girl sat down on the stool at the kitchen island; barely awake as she rested her chin in the palm of her hand.
Partly cloudy skies allowed bits of the sun to shine, lighting up the sky with its rays of sunshine and casting a golden hue on the city of Seoul, South Korea.
Staying up until almost four in the morning listening to music and writing down a bunch of lyrics wasn't a very responsible decision, and she was aware of it; now facing the consequences of pure exhaustion in the early hours of the mid-october day.
"My heart's been borrowed, and yours has been blue..?" She muttered out to herself, staring down at the notebook page with pursed lips and furrowed brows. "Good enough for now." She sighed out, setting the pencil down as it rolled across the marble countertop.
Standing up from the stool she sat at, her socked feet collided with the cold, wooden floors as she trudged lazily towards the coffee machine, hand wrapping around the handle to pull the kettle off of the small burner, pouring it carefully into the mug she had awaiting its arrival.
Carrying the mug along with her to her couch, the girl sighed as she settled herself down beside Sarang, who lay peacefully on top of a throw blanket she had already across the cushion.
Hyerin pressed the mug against her cheek, soaking in its warmth. Thinking back to that previous day, the girl couldn't help but let her mind travel to the topic of Oh Mijin. She had yet to reach out to her for what would be her last attempt at fixing what little pieces they had left of their years-long friendship.
Part of her wanted to refrain from doing so, fearful of what nasty remarks she'd earn once expressing her want and need to take a break from said friendship.
Yet, the other part of her was desperate to talk to the slightly older girl; a longing feeling in her heart to let everything out and finally be free from toxic situations until further notice.
Waves of stress washed over her as a groan sounded from her curled up frame, brows furrowing tightly as she sipped slowly at the hot coffee held in the pink colored mug.
It was safe to say that Hyerin was exhausted, not only just from staying up at ungodly hours, but from situations such as these as everything seemed to be piling up on her like stacks of paper.
Between school and torn friendships, the girl couldn't help but feel overwhelmed; hardly knowing what her next step would be.
But, luck seemed to be on her side as she thought about a certain someone of which seemed to fill her gloomy days with such comfort and care. Park Jongseong seemed to be such a gentle person with so much love and care to share kindly with others.
Hyerin cracked a small smile at the thought of the boy, expression softening unknowingly. He was someone she admired immensely, despite not knowing him for too long.
For that, it somehow made him even more admirable. To be able to gain so much of her respect within such a short timespan was endearing.
The girl blinked slowly as she wrapped her hands around the mug, warming them up as she lost herself in a sea of her own thoughts; pushing them to the front of her mind like waves crashing to shore as she stared off at the soft fabric of the rug underneath her coffee table.
Her hopeful expression said everything for her. She hoped and wished that their friendship would last long, as he seemed to be her only source of true comfort and happiness as of recently.
Yet, she couldn't help but feel slightly ashamed at the thought. The fact she was relying on someone else to keep her happy seemed wrong. The thought of burdening someone else with her issues seemed selfish, although it wasn't.
Deep down, she knew she was wrong about her own thoughts. She knew it wasn't selfish to seek comfort in somebody else, but it always felt that way. As much as she tried to push such thoughts away, it seemed impossible to do so as they kept coming back on a daily basis.
Hyerin couldn't help but feel a heavy feeling weighing down on her as she leaned forward, setting her mug down on a coaster set neatly on top of her coffee table, nimble hands swiftly digging into the pocket of her pajama pants to fish out her cellphone.
Unlocking her phone, she immediately traveled to her 'messages' app and clicked onto the familiar contact, a frown painting her lips as her thumbs hovered over her keyboard, circling letters as she searched for the right things to say.
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imessage mijin :)
today, 8:03am.
hyerin hey, just letting you know that i'm a bit tired of everything
hyerin i don't think i can continue to constantly reach out like this
hyerin so i'm letting you know that this is the last time i'll be doing this
hyerin if you would like to talk, please get back to me. otherwise, i will just completely stop trying
hyerin thank you and sorry delivered
______
THE girl exhaled shakily, turning off her phone as she nibbled down at her bottom lip anxiously. Her eyes traveled around the quiet apartment, before landing on the vase filled with fresh roses.
Her expression softened, the roses a reminder of comfort as she hugged her arms close to her chest, closing her eyes as she took in the quiet offered by the morning.
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★﹐authors corner ．﹗﹑ short + boring chapter combo aaa i'm so sorry akshwkdj 🤧
i wish i could make this longer but it seems that i completely ran out of words to use and my brain just stopped working pfft
i promise i'll try to write a longer chapter soon !! 🫡
also thank you to everyone reading this because it's so genuinely amazing how fast this ff is growing like what ?? 🤧
i literally love you all i'm not even kidding
thank you !! <3 july 20th, 2023 -- 12:55am. not proofread.
