I will always choose you...

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For as long as I could remember all I had were my siblings, I barely remembered my childhood before I lost my parents, I don't think I remember losing them either.

It was an explosion I know that, but I've heard the story told in so many different ways I don't know what's real. I don't want to know what's real, they're dead and that's hard enough I don't want to know the details. I don't want to know if it was more than one and if they saw the second one coming or what was going through their heads when it hit. I had spent too much time wondering what happened and no option was the right one. It didn't change the outcome.

Were we all together like it was any normal day, sat at a table as a family before our world was ripped apart?

Were we sat watching TV laughing together completely oblivious when my parents were taken from me?

If they saw it coming did they just want to spend their last moments together?

Do they know they left three kids behind? I don't want to know.

All I know is only we survived, then it was a life at hydra, which we won't talk about.

We never talk about it, we never needed to, it happened and there's nothing we could do about it. That's what my brother said, he told me not to mention it because it upsets my sister and the last thing I want to do is hurt her.

I was always closer with my brother growing up but I still loved Wanda to death and always will. She is always there for me. When we lost our brother, when we had to leave sokovia, she was there through all of it.

I remember losing my brother, it was the hardest thing I had ever gone through. It was like I had been ripped apart, as if he also lived in me and his soul was torn from my body. The love and strength he gave me was replaced by pain and hopelessness.

My brother was gone. The person who ran cricles around me and played games with me was now just a memory. I couldn't feel him anymore. It was like he'd been erased from everywhere but my mind.

My brother was gone and he could never come back.

Pietro. Why can't I ever say his name, I swallow a lump in my throat every time that name escapes my mouth, yes he was my brother but he was also more than that so why did I call him that?

Why did names always bother me?

Natasha Romanoff.

Another name that made my brain itch and my head ache, it caused such a reaction in me that I couldn't bear to hear it. My day was ruined just at the mention of her, I rolled my eyes just at the thought of her, she was the most infuriating person I ever met. Even before I had the displeasure of meeting her I hated her.

She was an assassin, cold, calculating and more stubborn than anyone I had ever known. She was always so cocky too and had a new girl on her arm every week and she was always at parties or out being a hero and of course she always got the first page. People loved her, I didn't understand why.

Till I did the same.