TWISTED DREAMS

16. Dahlia

Am I being too cruel?

Should I just accept Jeremy's proposal?

I wanted this to happen anyway.

I wanted him.

I like him too.

.

But,

He told me to stay away.

He pushed me away again and again.

I don't know what he thinks about me exactly.

He is secretive about his life.

He is reserved and exclusive.

He might be obsessed about my body but what about heart?

.

I also am obsessed but obsession is a one thing, what if I fall in love? What if he doesn't feel the same about me? What if he gets tired of me? What if eventually gets obsessed with someone else?

We've this past of three years, we're crazy about each other because we were never together.

But if we come together,

Will this heat be alive? What if we fight? He and I are different in many ways. What if it doesn't work between us?

Even though I am crazily obsessed with him,

Even though my body needs him like an oxygen,

Even though we fit each other perfectly,

I don't know him.

Fooling around is easy thing but dating?

Dating is being together.

Dating is a serious thing.

Are we even ready for it?

Overthinking drowned me in as I dipped my face in the pillow. I've been thinking the same thing for a week now.

.

Yeah,

It's been a week for Mount Pinatubo.

It's been a week for I rejected Jeremy.

Well, it wasn't rejection. It was asking for some time.

I need my head clear before I take any kind of decision.

Mom says that dating can effect on lot of things in our life. Our partner is responsible for what we feel, what we do in our daily life. The bond between two people decides our mood, vibe and aura. If you're happy with your partner, you're happy in your daily life. If you're suffering and insecure about your partner, your daily life will be complicated.

Argh Lia! Stop with the overthinking already!

I sank deep in my warm, fluppy bed. Rain pouring outside. Mid-afternoon looked like an evening because of the dark clouds. Lights closed, heater on, socks on and comfy sweats on.

Dad is at home today.

For me.

"Caterpillar?" Dad knocked on the door and opened it. He tilt his head and smiled at me. "How are you feeling?"

"Good." I tossed off my blanket from the corner and indicated Dad to come to me. "Come here."

"I got you heat-pack." He sat beside me on the bed and I sneaked into his arms quickly. My hands surrounded his stomach, head buried in his chest and leg on his legs.

"Stay with me." I whispered and hold him tightly. He pecked on my hair and rubbed my back gently.

"I bought you chocolate fountain ice-cream. You like it right?" Dad in his soft voice is another level comfort. He was already wearing the softest sweatshirt, off white sweatpants and unsettled hair. He is off-guard in the house. All comfy, all needy and all affectionate.