Chapter 5 - Serotonin depletion

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Thirty minutes

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Thirty minutes. That's how long we had until we were on stage. And Alan was nowhere.

"Fiza," Koushik Sir said, his voice tight with stress. "Find your partner. He better not be flaking out."

My heart hammered against my ribs. I texted him. Again. And again. No response. I called him over and over until, finally, the line connected.

"Hello!" he answered, his voice thick, his words slurring into each other.

"It's time for our show," I said, my words icy and flat. "Are you drunk?"

Silence. Heavy, guilty silence.

"I'll be there," he mumbled, and the line went dead.

He stumbled backstage with ten minutes to spare. The smell hit me first—the sour stench of alcohol. Then I saw it. A smudge of bright pink lipstick on the collar of his white shirt. I stared not able to take my eyes off it.

"What?" he asked, defensive, his gaze unfocused. "I was just... Nevermind."

Why did I care?

"I think we should do 'Happy Together'," I finally said, my voice hollow. "You'll at least have muscle memory." I couldn't even look at him. I turned and walked away, my vision blurring.

When our names were called, we walked onto the stage. The lights were blinding. I saw him lift his guitar, his fingers fumbling for a moment before he started strumming. Not the familiar, cheerful chords of "Happy Together." He was playing the intro to "More than Words."

My breath caught. This was a disaster waiting to happen. He was in no state to navigate this new, delicate song. Before he could realize his mistake and stop, I opened my mouth and began to sing. I poured every bit of hurt, every ounce of frustration into the lyrics, my voice steady and clear.

When he stumbled over his line, his words slurring slightly, I seamlessly covered his mistake. I sang us back to safety, note by painful note, while my heart broke a little for the perfect duet we had practiced for so long.

"Now that I've tried to
Talk to you and make you understand
All you have to do is close your eyes
And just reach out your hands and touch me
Hold me close, don't ever let me go
More than words is all I ever needed you to show
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
'Cause I'd already know"

I could feel his gaze on me. I saw the way he watched my lips form the words, the way his eyes followed the rise and fall of my chest between breaths.

When we finished, the applause was a distant roar in my ears. He reached for my hand and we walked off stage together. A perfect picture. A beautiful lie.

The second we were backstage, away from the crowd's eyes, I shook his hand off like it burned me.

"What the hell, Alan?" My voice was shaking with an anger I could no longer contain. Tears of disappointment, of betrayal welled in my eyes. "You show up late, drunk, and you play the wrong song?"

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