Love And Desire

Chapter 2

“Is your mom that stupid and careless not to see how flexible you have become?” Dad provoked when he first saw me.

It’s the second time we’re meeting since I arrived New Zeeland.

I sighed away the statement and settled on the side reserved for us. Dad was not liking my new appearance. I’ve never seen him this mad in my entire life.

It just makes me feel like I’ve become so thin and fragile like a thin plain wood. Am sure by now, he must have noticed mom’s weird lifestyle.

The coffee shop is a sophisticated one. Floor-to- ceiling windows where I can see through to the outside.

Dad thanked the waiter when he brought in our order. Chocolate Chunk Waffles, Shortbread, biscotti and Cinnamon Buns alongside two frappucino for me and a mug of espresso latte for himself.

Who are gonna finish these? I don’t eat too much lately. Minority of my clothes are slim-fit now.

“You’ll have to finish THESE before we leave this place.” Dad declared, pointing at the yummy looking goodies in front of me. “I don’t want whereby an heavy wind blew and took you off like a shaft of dry leaves.”

I began to imagine myself as a brown leaf seated on the dry light brown sand in the desert and all of a sudden, a strong wind from the west, took me off the ground to nowhere.

No. I’ll better eat now.

I didn’t wait for dad to start as I nod my head and dived into breakfast.

Dad looks so rich and self concerned. As we were enjoying our yummy breakfast, I kept on studying his appearance – differing it from his old version before he left mom and I.

I know he now has a big house in Poland and another one in Greece. Him and grandma – his biological mother, used to live in the one at Greece.

I miss grandma. Just the mere thought of her makes me crave for her sweet warm hugs. I spent the last two summer with her there and I wish I could beg dad to go back there.

I miss all the Danish movies we used to watch in the movie room. She is Danish and her accent is strong. Her late husband – grandpa, was New Zeeland just like Dad. Dad look so much like grandpa and I look less like mom.

Dad use to say, I got my red hair from grandma and space tooth from grandpa. Just the little brown dots on my cheeks makes me think I still got mom’s signature on me.

I don’t know why I hate her now!

“Your grandma expects to see you at month ending, but unfortunately, you won’t go because you’ll be getting married in a few days.”

Who? Me?

Okay, first things first. What is he talking about and who else is he referring to about getting married in a few days?

I capture the part he said I’ll be seeing grandma – which just boosted my immune system into a jungle bell dance but the other part is something I don’t understand.

“Dad, what the hell are you talking about?”

He stopped eating and focused his attention on me. “What am talking about is you getting married to Prince Harry in five days interval.”

“And who the fucking hell is this Prince Harry?” Am seriously going to drag this topic down if Dad isn’t cautious enough.

“Language.” He warned. “This is public. Majority of the people here might be listening. Tomorrow a chopper will arrive to fly you to England where you’ll go on a date with him. You don’t need to bother about what to wear. Everything are already set prepared for you beforehand. Just as your education to school in Cambridge is being taken care of by the king.”

This is such a big joke. A very expensive one.

For heaven’s sake, I just graduated from high school not even up to a month yet, and am said to fall into an arranged relationship with a man I barely know?

Doesn’t that so-called Prince have sense of humor or wisdom of his own to think straight that it’s abnormal for someone to just wake up one morning and said to marry a woman he haven’t met once or seen before in his lifetime?

This is crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“I can’t.” Just one simple word to clarify how hard am trying to suppress my beast inside me before it unleash.

Dad’s brow went up in a question mark.

I didn’t hide my confidence to repeat it twice. “I just can’t marry that……that…..” What was his name earlier? “Prince whatever you called him.”

Dad’s eyes suddenly narrow at me and his lips pressed tightly. “You have no choice, Irene. The deal has been done!”

“So this was a deal you made with the British empires to sell me out and add more funds into your bank account!” I retorted, irrespective of who I was talking with.

I use to be quiet like a mute girl but today, am as vibrant as never. And dad just sat there for a while, observing and staring at me if I was still his biological daughter.

“Irene….” I heard him call my name under gritted teeth. “Whether you like it or not, you’re marrying Prince Harry – quote me anywhere! And FYI, I never sold you out. It’s just for the best. For your future.”

Ha! For my future? Is he a god to decide my fate? He only know little about me for the past six years of my life. Finish!

He is totally absent from the rest of my life or what am even up to.

“For the love of God, Dad.” I close my palms together in front of me like I want to make my prayers. “I don’t want to make a scene here and I hope you understand me. I’m just eighteen – too young to marry at this age to a man I don’t know.”

“Prince Harry is just twenty.” He held my hands and kept it down. “Believe me, he is going to be good for you. I know him, he is a good boy.”

“Dad, you still don’t get it, do you?” I groaned. I feel like crying if he says NO. “I have plans – big plans for life. I’ve gotten the newly made admission form for Stockholm already. I need to go to college and –“

“You will be going to Cambridge with Prince Harry.” I hate how he honor’s the bloody prince’s name –

Wait! What the hell did he just say? Maybe he had said it before and I just paid deaf ears.

But my ears are sharp and clearly opened now.

“I’ll be doing what? Going to college – Cambridge!” Fucking hell! “With that anonymous guy?” I hate Cambridge.

“Shh.” Dad crosses a finger on his lips. “People are listening.”

Like I care?

“Well, fuck them off!” I sparked. “Like I give a fuck if they’re eavesdropping?”

Dad sighed, then took a deep sip of his espresso latte. “It won’t surprise me if you start nagging like your mother.”

Geez. That’s…….gross.

Because I hate mom! She dumped me since I got back here.

“So….does this means that mom knew about it too?” When he nodded, I felt like breaking the cup of frappucino with my bare hands. My mother is not worthy to be called my mother anymore.

She probably didn’t give a shit when dad told her about this barbaric news. I think she has been waiting long enough to sell me out. After all, what am I still doing with her by now?

“I asked her to remain quiet until you finish high school.”

“Dad, I still don’t like the offer.” I almost cried. I feel like peeing on myself and crying in the bathroom all day long. “I want to live my personal life by myself and study in Stockholm. It’s my dream.”

“Sweetheart, believe me, I know it’s your dream to school in Stockholm.” His voice low and consoling. “I have never been against your opinion but this one is different.”

“Why is it so vital that you can’t even listen to me now?” I sniff my nose. Water gagging in my nostrils.

“As I have said before, it’s for the best. For you, my dear. I don’t want you to end up like your mom and I.” He seized for a while like he regrets something. “I just want you to be happy and live a fulfill life.”

With a coward? A ghost or a beast probably?

Am still not going to sign this offer. It doesn’t tally with my mindset. I don’t want to get married and I don’t want to fall in love.

Love is fake. Something that is temporary and doesn’t last long.

Take for example, mom and dad had me through love but where are they now?

They’re poles apart!

Mom’s life is miserable and Dad’s life is just better. I don’t want to fall in love so I don’t look like them in the future.

But when Dad told me grandma would be coming for the wedding if I only accept to go on a date with the troll, I had no choice but to pretend like I signed the offer.

What I needed was just to see my grandma and cry in her arms and tell her everything life has been to me and discuss this shitty issues with her. Maybe she’ll be of help to talk to Dad.