𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 | 𝐊𝐨𝐥 𝐌𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨𝐧

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄

{CHAPTER 0.9}
ALONE

You really make me hate myself
had to stop before I break myself
-o.a

♔

THE PERSON–THE VAMPIRE THAT STOOD IN FRONT OF ME, was unrecognizable. Like me Kol would kill or do what he had to keep his family strong and living. That's what this all was, his big brother called him telling him their long existence was in danger their family existence. So he did what he had. "Who are you?" I uttered out, looking into his chocolate brown eyes they were filled with darkness. I've seen it before but when I look at him and he looks at me there's something that lets that dark pain disappear. "Adrienne." He began. "Who is this person? " I questioned again, this time motioning my hand over Mary Potters dead corpse hanging like a shelf on the wall.

"I never wanted you to see me the way I see myself."He spoke, looking not at me but at his feet. He never wanted me to see this side of him? Really? That was quite funny, yet it was true I'd seen the dark sides of the original siblings but the truth is that darkness comes from a place of pain and trauma. The worst kind of trauma the damaging kind parents can have on their children, hell I knew all about that. "Well I guess all the stories of the murderous Kol Mikealson are true then." I stated, looking at him, seeing a shift in his expression. "But I really don't care." At my words he looked at me, that darkness slowly fading right before me. I took a few steps towards him, I reached my hand in attempts to curious his pale tan skin. He stopped grabbing my wrist instantly.

"Darling," he spoke gently with a hiss. "I'm every bit wrong for you." He told me soon looking into my eyes "you're every bit of pure,warmth—" Pure? I questioned. With everything I endured I don't remember what it feels like to be pure, not even happy. How could he see me as pure? "There's something about you Adrienne Salvatore...I just don't know what it is." Kol expressed, moving a piece of my hair out of my face putting it behind my ear. "I'm supposed to hate you." I mumbled, "I'm supposed to hate your family...but I don't." Klaus took Stefans will power making him become the monster he fought to hide away. Kols tried to kill Damon and yet I don't hate them, maybe it's because I see myself and my brothers in them or maybe its because they just want to protect each other and value family and I respect that.

"And why is that Darling?" He asked as he held my hand in his. "I don't know."

♔ ♔ ♔ ♔

"Thank goodness," Damon cursed as I entered the boarding house taking me into an embrace. "What was that all about back there?" He continued his questioning, "Nothing." I brushed off walking to my room. "What the hells been going on with you lately?" He shouts back as my foot makes it to the first step, soon shifting my head to his frame noticing Stefan entering the room. "Ever since Klaus brought his psycho kid brother back from the dead you've been drooling over him like a lost puppy. Not to mention you going against me and Stef." Damon went on. "You have some damn nerve!" I shouted back, speeding to face him. "As I can recall we've been in Mystic falls for what? 2 years now because you two have been infatuated with a girl who gets everyone around her hurt and have forgotten I exist." I shouted with sadness that soon turned into anger. "You know what I don't why I thought after kathrine my brothers would actually make me feel like they would search the heavens for me but that's only goddamn possible if my is fucking Elena Gilbert!" I ended. "Dri— "No Stefan, don't try to make it seem like I'm overreacting because you two show me you'll never fight the devil for me. So why have I been "drooling over" Kol Mikaelson you ask—well he make me feel like I have someone but at the end of the day I'm alone."

Over the centuries my brothers and I went our separate ways yet stayed close while they went off to find themselve i went to fix myself. I watched them suffer and that broke me as a little girl, the only person I was ever truly afraid of was my father, a fear we all shared. Throughout all my years of being a vampire I haven't turned it off not once, our emotions, our humanity is what made us human—what kept us from being heartless savages. What if deep down being an emotionless vampire was better than feeling all the pain and trauma we wear like scars?

I walked along the clock tower in the middle of the town's square in the darkness, suddenly a brush of wind came in from the side of me appearing Kol. "Darling if you're planning to jump I'm afraid you won't die." He told me with a small chuckle in an attempt to brighten the mood. "What's wrong?" He simply asked calmly. I chuckled letting out a sniffle as my eyes began to water as what I was about to say resinated. "I'm alone. I never knew that even with family you could feel so alone."

"Hey..hey you're not alone i'm right here." He told me lifting up my chin making our gaze lock. "I'm not leaving you, so you're not alone." It was unreal how in this moment with him I forgot everything every bad thing that's ever happened to me, all the times I felt alone felt like dreams with him here next to me. "You make it really hard for me to hate you." I told him as he wiped tears off my bare rosy cheeks. "And you make every cell in my body want to change."Kol expressed, staring right through me as if I was glass. "And I don't know why."

A:N- RIP Angus Cloud ❣️
7-31-23 rest with love and peace.