for every question why || L.S

6. why am i doing this?

Harry's pov

it's been a few days since the incident. i may have done it multiple times after that. i always try to stop it but it's too good to just give up. i am trying tho hopefully if i pray hard enough it'll just go away.

i'm sitting at the dinner table with my wife. tirelessly i eat my food waiting for her to go to bed so i can get up to my usual activities. she's going on about something but i'm not really listening.

"listen to me for christ sake!" she hits my head with her fist i just take it "sorry i've been tired today" i apologize i'm so weak when it comes to her not in the good way.

"yeah seems like you've been tired a lot recently harry why's that?" she asks sarcastically "works been pretty-" i start to talk but she slaps me across the face "try again no lying this time." she says

"i wasn't lying i-" she scoffs "who's the bitch harry?" she says and i frown

"excuse me?" i say and she looks at me in the eye "don't act innocent you little cunt. i know you're cheating on me. just tell me who the bitch is."

"i'm not i-" she slaps me across the face harder this time so hard my eyes tear up a little but i swallow the pain and look at her "i promise there's no one mary" i say and she scoffs

"you think i'm stupid harry?" i put my head down to avoid eye contact "you think i'm one of those dumb little whores you fuck?!" she pulls my hair forcing me to look up at her as she's standing next to me while i'm sitting

she's pulling on my hair really hard. it really hurts like it's gonna hurt for days. "answer me!" she yells and i start tearing up again from the pain but i try to blink it away

"i don't i swear to you mary i don't i'm not cheating and i don't think you're stupid please don't hit me again." she looks down at me like i'm pathetic. not in the hot way.

she lets go of my hair and i put my hand on the spot she pulled and find it very tender and painful. "well why have you been so tired and distracted lately huh?" she asks

"it's work mary i swear to you." she sighs "why must you always. fucking. lie." she slaps me after each word and now i'm actually crying

"would you please stop hitting me?!" i shout and she looks at me with kind of crazy eyes. that's where i know i'm about to be bruised to the good heavens

"are you raising your voice at me harry?" she asks and i just brace for impact.

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"go. i can't even look at you anymore rent a hotel or something you filthy scum. never yell at me ever again huh?" she walks upstairs and i am left bruised crying like a little baby bitch. dear god what did i do to deserve this.

i sniffle and get in my car crying my eyes out for a little while because i'm a bitch and then i look over to louis's house. i want him. i wanna feel him he's the only thing that will make me feel better right now i can't go to him crying like a little baby bitch tho can i?

i wipe my tears on my face and neck and the back of my ears and said "now it's sweat now it's sweat it's sweat now."

i walk over to his house and see a messy haired pj wearing louis "harry?" he asks confused fuck i must've woke him up.

"i'm sorry" i sniffle "i didn't really check the time." i say awkwardly and he reaches out to caress my face "have you been crying baby?"

i just fucking melt. i've never experienced this emotion before the feeling of being taken care of cared for? i've always been roughed out even by my own wife and there he was. this sweet creature just taking me in. baby. i've never been cared for in such a way. he called me baby.

"n-no it's sweat..i don't cry.." i lie and he frowns "you can tell me my love i won't judge you for being human." he caresses my cheek with his thumb.

"me and mary had a fight. im going to go book a hotel i just- something pulled me to come here and you definitely helped." i say honestly. he helped a simple nickname and touch really goes a long way.

"come inside i'll make you some tea and we can talk about your fight okay?" he offers and i nod walking inside his home and following him to the kitchen as he makes the tea immediately when i enter i feel warm. soft. happy. accepted. safe.

"here you go." he hands me my cup of tea and we sit down on the couch. "so what happened." he asks gently speaking softly like he's genuinely trying to help.

"she thinks i'm cheating because i've been distracted with work." i'm lying to him too now. amazing.

"yeah? and what made you cry about it?" he asks and i look up at him and i can't help but feel safe around him. he wouldn't make fun of me right? mock me for letting a woman hurt me in such ways like i'm a child.

you can't. you just can't he's not gonna understand. no one will.

"just the stress of it all." i lie again and he nods "i think zayn might have pjs in your size i'll go check yeah?" he says and i frown "what why?" i ask

"my love. paying for a hotel when you have a good place to stay right here is just stupid." he walks upstairs to what i'm assuming is 'zayns' room or maybe they share rooms i don't know.

he comes down with pjs "check if these are your size he has bigger ones but i think these will fit" he says he's offering me pjs instead of letting me just sleep on the couch with my work clothes.

why does he care so much?

"yeah i just erm need to go to like drop my car off down the block so that she doesn't know i'm staying nearby is that okay?" i say and he nods "of course honey i won't sleep till you come back yeah?" he says and i nod walking out

i get in my car and try to pull out the driveway as silently i make my way to the block and just let out the most girliest squeal ever. what the fuck is wrong with me dude

why am i acting like this?

i walk down to louis's house and get inside he smiles "you actually came back wow" he says and i smile "i did." he hands me the pjs again.

"go try them on and if they don't fit i'm sure we can work something out" he says and then leads me to the guest room bathroom. their house is built exactly like ours but inverted. except that the guest room here is a 'future nursery' in our house.

"thank you louis. so so much." i say and he nods. "of course! let me know if they fit you okay?" he says and i nod

i change into the pjs and then smile softly seeing that they fit me but they're a bit big. i don't care tho they're good enough

i walk out and he smiles "bit big but you think that's okay?" he asks and i nod "thank you honestly you're so kind and-" he rolls his eyes with a smile

"stop thanking me and go to sleep." he says and i nod "do you want a goodnight kiss?" he asks and i frown

"like what what- what do you mean a good-" i gulp nervously "goodnight kiss?" i say.

he giggles "a goodnight kiss on the forehead haz." he says and i nod "sure?" i ask confused me and mary don't do that kind of thing we just go to sleep

he tries to get on his tiptoes to kiss my forehead but then he gives up and just kisses my chest "that's good enough right?" he says and i nod giving him a forehead kiss.

he blushes as he stares up at me. "goodnight harry." he says still staring into my eyes "goodnight louis." i say back staring into his eyes. we stay like that for what feels like forever but probably was like two seconds. before he walks out leaving me in my room for the night cuddling my pillow and imagining it was him.

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