Manipulator (red eye fan fic)

Cigarettes

Once I got out of the hospital I looked fucking homeless. I looked like a crack whore.

I walked to my house, feeling sorry for myself the whole way there.

When I got there it was 10:30, they let me out at 10:00. I felt like I wanted to go out tonight, once again get my mind off things, like ending my life. Once I got into my house I ran upstairs, turning on the lights. Slipping into a short black party dress, with black heels. I did my makeup dark to math my dress, and brushed out my hair. I left, not even thinking about Jackson.

When I got to the club, I grabbed something that I never thought I would ever need again, a cigarette. I lit it and Inhaled, it felt so good. I let out the smoke from my mouth and sighed in relief.
"Just A bay breeze.."

"Okay"

I took a seat and the bar tender served me my bay breeze.
Was I an alcoholic? I've been drinking 3 days in a row, it's amazing but it's going to ruin my mental health.
I realized that I haven't ate in days, it wasn't the first thing that came to mind when taking care of myself so I didn't do it, it felt euphoric to not eat, that's I why stopped eating as a teen. But I did it again, finally realizing that it was really bad for me.

I puffed my cigarette and inhaled, I wasn't going to waste it.

I watched as a lady sat beside me, she was beautiful, with auburn hair and blue eyes, she was stunning. She looked at me, and smiled kindly. I smiled back and took a sip of my bag breeze. I watched as she shuffled through her purse, looking for something.

"Shit! Um I'm sorry so you have a lighter I can use?"

"Oh yes of course! Let me grab it."

I shuffled through my purse and grabbed my lighter, and handed it to her.
"Thank you, ugh today was a rough day.."

"Yeah, definitely.."

"Tell me, what happened to you today?" She asked.

I didn't think telling her was the right thing but I was to dumbstruck to realize that, telling her my whole life story, and how I met Jackson. Though I didn't tell her about the part where he's an assassin and the part where I got kidnapped and all that..

"Damn, you had a worse day than I did.. im really sorry."

"Hah, it's fine.."

We talked and laughed for at least 1 hour, I thought I was free, once again. I didn't know where Jackson was, and I didn't care. He didn't deserve me, but I also didn't deserve him. He was beautiful, angelic. And I was kind, but I don't know if I was pretty, but I guess obviously since I was with Jackson..
his eyes when he cried that night when I got shot was amazing, it was so rare it turned me on. He was beautiful, and he knew it.

It was now 12:00 and the woman I met had to go, it was sad I didn't even know her name. I felt guilty for not asking.

I flirted with guys who sat next to me, and watched as they left, watching time fly by. I then suddenly saw Jackson enter the club, I was so drunk I wonder what he would say.

"Hey sweetheart.. how are you?.."

"Oh my god jackson! Hi! Can you take me home, im to lazy to walk.."

I was so drunk and he knew, he looked at me with a smirk, as I grabbed onto him. He put his arm around me and tried to hold me up.

"Brooke your really drunk.."

"Fuck you asshole.."

"Im sorry, I'll bring you home.."

I smiled at him, pulling my dress down so he can look at my cleavage. I saw as he took a look but quickly looked away.
I felt bad for getting drunk 3 days in a row but it was my only escape from reality, other than cigarettes, my new escape.

Jackson put me in his black corvet, putting on my seatbelt. I watched as he hopped in the car, turning on the radio. As soon as Florida kilos by Lana del ray came on, I was feeling great. I didn't have a worry. I felt good. Nothing to fucking worry about.