THE SHADOW PATH ⎯ james potter

[050]

chapter fifty:

if tomorrow never comes

Ellie, James, Sirius, Regulus, and Evan sat in the near-empty library, the weight of the situation pressing down on all of them like a suffocating fog. 

The soft flicker of candlelight illuminated their pale, exhausted faces, but the silence between them was deafening. They had lost so many already—Barty, Lily, Peter, Dorcas—and now Remus, too, was gone.

Ellie, sitting with her arms wrapped tightly around herself, stared blankly at the table. Her heart ached with the fresh loss of her brother, a deep, gnawing pain that felt like it would never fade. 

She had always been close to Remus since being adopted by the Lupin's, always relied on him to be the steady presence in her life, and now he was gone, trapped in the shadow path like the others. 

The thought of him, suspended in that dark, cold void, was unbearable.

But as much as the loss tore at her, she couldn't deny that someone else in the group seemed even more shattered than she was.

Sirius sat slumped in his chair, head bowed, fists clenched tightly on the table. His usually lively and mischievous eyes were dark, hollowed with guilt and grief. He hadn't spoken since they'd arrived in the library. Not a word. He barely even looked at any of them.

James, sitting beside him, shot him worried glances every few minutes but didn't know what to say. No one did. The weight of Remus's absence hung heavy between them, a void they didn't know how to fill.

Ellie shifted in her seat, glancing at Sirius from across the table. She could see how much he was struggling, how broken he looked. She wasn't used to seeing him like this—he was always so full of life, always the first to crack a joke or lighten the mood. But now, it was as though a part of him had been ripped away, leaving only a shell behind.

"Sirius..." Ellie said quietly, her voice tentative, but he didn't respond. He kept staring down at the table, his shoulders hunched, as if the weight of his grief was too much to bear.

James cleared his throat, his voice gentle. "Sirius, mate... talk to us."

For a moment, it seemed like Sirius hadn't heard him, but then, slowly, he lifted his head. His eyes, when he finally looked up, were red-rimmed and filled with a deep, aching sorrow. "I should've done something," he muttered, his voice barely audible. "I should've... I should've been able to stop this."

Ellie frowned, leaning forward. "Sirius, this isn't your fault—"

"He's my best friend!" Sirius snapped, his voice cracking with emotion. "And I couldn't protect him. I couldn't—" He broke off, his fists trembling. "Remus trusted me. I swore I'd always have his back, and now he's..."

His voice trailed off, and he slammed his fist down on the table, the sharp sound echoing through the library. 

James flinched, but he didn't try to stop Sirius. 

He knew better.

"Sirius," Regulus spoke up, his tone calm but firm, "there's nothing any of us could have done. The shadow path... it's unpredictable. You can't blame yourself for this."

Sirius shot him a look, a mixture of anger and pain in his eyes. "You don't get it, Reg. You've never been as close to anyone as I was with Remus."

Regulus's expression hardened slightly, but he didn't retort.