IF (JJK SatoSugu AU)

~1~

The first night back was spent restless.

Laying in his dorm room, staring up at the ceiling for hours.

The sounds of their clapping permeating his mind.

Watching in slow motion as one of the few non sorcerers he grew to care for – Riko-chan – willfully choosing to walk away from her prechosen destiny only to get shot in the head.

An innocent middle school girl, blood seeping down her face, forming a puddle of crimson under her cranium, killed.

And he couldn't even defeat the assassin responsible. No cursed energy but peak physical prowess. Skilled Combatant. He was spared but left to wallow in shame.

"But even with that blessing, you were all beaten by a monkey like me who can't even use cursed techniques. If you want to live a long life, never forget that."

Toji Fushiguro's last words to him. The banished failure of the Zen'in clan turned sorcerer killer as payback to end their failure of a society by his own hands. A monkey with no cursed techniques defeated him; a Special-Grade, sparing him so as not to see him become a curse or worse if he died letting all his cursed spirits run loose.

He used to be the strongest.

With Gojo.

The strongest duo.

Things have changed.

Suffocating pressure on his chest sent him stirring up and out from under the bed sheet. Sliding the window open to free his lungs from the stale hold inside, the cool air blowing brushed back his bangs.

"Your bangs are weird too!"

Riko-chan's ghost echoing those words back to him made a small bitter smile appear.

Whisked away by the pull of the night, he maneuvered himself onto the window framing, grabbing the edge of the roof before pulling himself carefully up, as is being on the top floor of the dormitory.

Settling into a secure spot atop the Buddhist designed roofing, Geto settled back on his arms as he simply watched.

The grounds at night looked calm at first glance.

Yet even with the cicadas chirping, the shaking tree leaves, the distant noises of craft soaring high upon through the cloudy midnight sky, none could rival the applause coming back to mind.

He could sense the presences of his comrades in their own rooms.

Satoru is alive.

Knocked out in bed, snoring soundly no doubt.

A stark contrast to his eerily calm expression; those vividly bright eyes just one slip away from reeking madness upon all those devotees. Carelessly throwing out the suggestion they kill all those normies themselves.

Not a care in the world.

It was tempting.

But without rhythm or reason, his morals wouldn't stand for mindless bloodshed.

Yet, as he finally collected his bearings and caught up to Satoru, walking out of that Time Vessel's facility with Riko in his arms, the morbid question wormed into Suguru's mind.

Even if he could keep up the surfaced facade of being unscathed, Geto knew deep down it was far from that truth.

His ideals.

His resentment towards non sorcerers.

The realistic difference in power levels between himself and Gojo.

The toxic conflict boiling inside over the morals of his identity as a sorcerer.

Satoru ...

His near death experience by Zen'in's hand unlocked his deepest potential.

No doubt he will work tirelessly to put a dent into their cursed world power base.

The events of their failed protection mission have been etched in.

With Tengen-sama's barriers now weakened, the power balance has shifted even further.

Satoru will train to work harder than any one of them.

His own ego wouldn't dare let him repeat their past mistakes.

He would face the hurdles head on.

Alone.

Without him.

The guilt and remorse would never leave Geto well enough alone.

"The strongest moves forward ... and the weakest gets forgotten." Geto murmured drearily to the clouded sky.

He spent a long time just staring, hugging his legs to his chest, burying his ragged face in his knees, lost within his own world.

The rest of the week and the several that would follow would be spent with sleepless nights and intrusive thoughts, cracks forming, growing on the seal of the moral compass that is - was - Geto Suguru.

A/N: I couldn't wait to post it.

This past arc has got me mad, head over heels, obsessed with this OTP.

Writing AUs to tragic pairs helps me cope.

Until next time, later~!