Relapse - Buttercup!Reader

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Summary: you can't quit him

Pairings: Lloyd Hansen X Reader

Rating: explicitly angsty

Warnings: explicit language, explicit sexual content, smut, unprotected sex, PIV sex, sex with an ex, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 1K

Rolling up to that familiar house, you want to kick yourself for ever thinking this was a good idea

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Rolling up to that familiar house, you want to kick yourself for ever thinking this was a good idea. Looking in the mirror to make sure no one is around. Your hands shaking, as you try to push away the nerves. The raw feeling of not wanting to be alone this evening.

Telling yourself that this was it. This would be the last time, but you doubt yourself. He was your drug that you couldn't quit. And just when you thought you'd kicked the habit, you relapsed and found yourself on Lloyd's doorstep.

Not even having to knock on the door, and he was pulling you inside. His own eyes checking to see if the nosey neighbors were seeing who he was pulling into his home.

The moment the door closes, the two of you are like a magnet. The pull clearly evident as your lips press against the others. Everything familiar and comforting, as you and Lloyd start the quick removal of each other's clothes.

He pulls you closer to him, and your body arches into his. Running your fingers over his hair, and stupidly opening your eyes, and you see the hunger and desperation of his as he starts backing you down to the floor. No time for decorum, just a pure animalistic need to prove that you and him aren't pure toxicity together.

Laying his body over yours, his hips keep your thighs spread wide, and you feel his hardening cock through his boxer briefs. Whimpering into his mouth, while you pull down his underwear. As old lovers do, his body reacts to your movements. Second nature, natural, and just seamless, as his cock drives into your cunt.

Both hands on his cheeks as you hold him to your face. His hips hypnotic as they stab into your needy cunt. Your body conforming to his perfectly, just like old times. And you ache for something simpler, when the two of you didn't fight for dominance. The both of feeling like you were always right, and refused compromise. But this? The moment where the two of you connect was always magic.

Looking into his eyes like he was the only one important. Panting into each others mouths, and only seeing him. Only feeling him. Wishing that things were different.

Knowing that this back and forth was such a waste of time, but you yearned for him in a way that you didn't understand. Needing to just get him and his body out of your system.

"This is the last time," you whisper onto his neck. Wrapping your legs around him, you push him even closer to you. Balls deep inside of you, and you feel so full and just perfect.

"That's what you said last night," Lloyd's voice heated and raspy as he ruts into you. Unknowing if he wants it to just be over. Try and quit you cold turkey. But the way he moves into you, the feeling of completion with the two of you becoming one, says he's just as addicted as you are.

Entertaining the notion of one last time, every time. And maybe it was because he needed this hit just as bad as you did. Gripping your nails tightly on his back, you sigh up at him. Knowing there will only be one Lloyd Hansen. He was it, and you couldn't make it work.

Whispering up his name breathily, you feel his hard exterior start to wilt. That arrogant smirk turning into completely longing for you. Changing his pace to a slow and deep roll, as he puts an arm around you; pulling you even closer to him. "You can't quit," he moans onto your skin. Feeling his cock twitch deep inside of you, and you hold on even tighter, "And I don't want you to."

"Don't," you warn him as you feel the heat build up in your stomach. His thrusts guiding you right to the edge. "I can quit when I'm ready."

Seeing that glimmer in his eyes when they go glossy, makes you kiss on his neck. Now a fast and pounding pace. Gritting your teeth as your orgasm breaks free. His own body stuttering. Hot ribbons of his cum squirt into your womb, and your body goes limp. "I'm not in love with you," you whisper at him.

"I am in love with you," your eyes slowly drift close, and you cling to the sound of that sentiment. One of the things Lloyd never told you while you were together.

"I'm not hurting anybody."

He leans back, sweat dripping around his hairline, and he shakes his head in disbelief, "You're killing me. So do I not count?"

"Lloyd, don't do this. Not right now."

He pulls himself out of you, and sits onto the floor. His face pointing at you, but his eyes look at anything but you, "We're just going to hide under the covers and make love all night and pretend that I don't love you. I love you when you stay and I love when you leave. It just hurts."

When you sit un-answering he stands, holding a hand down to you. "That's all you want? Another secret. Pretend that there's no history, that I'm just a high when you need a hit?"

"Yes. Please. Please, do this for me."

"This is your last time," he extends his hand down to help you. Ready to start your night long binge of Lloyd Hansen.

"That's what you said last time."

"You're my favorite drug, Buttercup. I wish you'd allow yourself to be more than that," you can't. You won't. And still within a week or two, you know, you're going to be right back here. The same song and dance. Both of you know how much you lie to yourselves, but also each other.

"I'm sorry, Lloyd."

"Yeah...me, too."

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