I don't deserve you

Childhood

I never though of what was to come. My life changed when spider started hanging around us. I wouldn't tell if it was that I just starting liking him or what but he grew on me. Him and Kiri were very close friends and when they hung out, I could tell Neytiri didn't like it.

When I was young spider started coming to the village a lot more and he was even part of the family but Neytiri didn't think so. She would always  say "he belongs with his own kind" but he isn't like them. Norm is here and she never complains about him. I don't get what she has against spider.

Maybe it's his father that she doesnt like about him but he's nothing like him. I like spider for who he is. Norm is my dad, I was born before the war. Trudy, my mom, died in that war and I was alone with some nurses at the lab because I couldn't go anywhere. I've heard so many stories about the war and how my mom sacrificed herself for the clan. I always look up to her, she's like my idol. That thing is I look a lot like my dad but I have my moms eyes.

Neytiri has always loved me and adores me like one of her own but with spider, not so much. I think he gets on her nerves just by breathing. I mean his dad did take away a lot. Her home, her dad and even her first Ikran. Not to mention that a lot of people died from the war. He took away Tsutey, Neytiris best friend. Tsutey was like a brother to Jake and when Jake had to kill him because he was suffering, Neytiri cried for days on end.

I never get to know a lot about my mom cause my dad never likes to talk about her but max and Jake tells me a lot. I want to fly a ship just like she did. I know it's dangerous but it sounds so fun.

My dad was always distant from me but we had our moments. That would always be when he would talking about sciencey stuff that I did not like but I had fun talking to him.

Spider had an eye for cool plants in the forest, we would always see these plants that looked like they would swallow you whole. According to max they could do we had to be careful. When we were little me and spider had a secret spot by the creek. We would meet there after lunch everyday and play around til eclipse. I loved hanging with him it was like he was the other half to my broken heart.