The next three classes went down the same way, and someone in 4th period spitballed me.
I'm sitting here at our usual bench, and I think about him, about Yanic when my thoughts are interrupted my someone saying something.
I turn around and see Jensen. Great. What does he want?
"H-hi", he starts, "Is it okay if I sit here?"
What.
"Um-" I'm not sure how to respond, so I choose the default answer: "Yeah, sure."
So he awkwardly sat down. We ate in silence for about five minutes and then he tried to make conversation.
"So... do you have any hobbies..?" Then gave that annoying smile that he gave when he tried to weasel his way out of a punch or an insult.
He couldn't take an insult?
"Uh.. I like playing video games I guess." I replied.
Jensen's face lit up. "Oh! Cool, what games do you play?"
"Um, Blox Dragons." I mumbled back.
"Oh me too! I play allll the time!" He laughed.
Then he rambled on about the game, and after a few minutes, I made an excuse to leave.
"Yeah, I forgot I had a project I had to turn in, so I'm going to do that." I lied.
"Oh, okay."
As I was getting up to leave, he took out his phone and said, "Give me your number?"
Why not. I put my phone number in his phone and walked back into the school. I had nothing to do, so I went to the bathroom as a place to sit and do stuff on my phone.
I sat down in my stall and unlocked my phone- still no messages from Yanic.
I closed my phone and sat there, looking at the stall door, wondering what I was going to do about Yanic. I couldn't just wait until he came back to school to talk, I could go to his house? But his parents wouldn't let me in.
I felt my phone buzz. It was a message from Jensen.
Jensen: Hey :)
A smile emoji. Of course he would. What a nice guy. I tried to think of a response, preferably passive aggressive so he would back off, but I couldn't so I just typed hey back.
You: Hey.
I put a period so he would maybe get a hint.
Jensen: So, what's your username on blox dragons? :D
I cringed, thinking of having to play games with this guy. But I decided to give him my user so he wouldn't keep bugging me about it.
You: @fosterx89
Jensen: Ok! Mine is @jensen_astronaut45
What? Was astronaut a random word he used for his username or was he obsessed with space or something?
You: ok i'll friend you.
Jensen: Cool! I guess that means we're friends now. :)
No, the fuck it does not.
The rest of the school day was a blur, with the same whispers, comments, and shit. When I walked out of the school my mood became worse. I had to walk. I walked everyday, but that was before I was put in this wall of shame. Who knew what could happen on my way home? The jocks seemed especially aggressive about this, probably because Jorge, one of the jocks, was friends with Jensen.
I prepared myself and started on my way. I got a few stupid jokes thrown at me, but I was too worried about the jocks and what they would do.
After a few minutes I realized it must me sports practice day or something because the jocks were nowhere to be seen.
A weight had been lifted off of me, so I was mostly okay for the rest of the walk.
I arrived at my house and stood there, behind the mailbox. My parents were pretty pissed at me, but they mostly calmed down during the weekend.
I sighed and opened the door with my key. I was grounded so I would have to give my parents my phone. I checked my texts one more time- still nothing from Yanic- and went inside.
"I'm home!" I yelled.
"Oh! Welcome back!" My mom replied with too much enthusiasm. It was nothing unusual, though. She always did this. She was either really happy or really angry.
"Yeah."
"Oh, right. Phone?" She said more sternly, but her eyes were still bright.
"Here you go." I handed her my phone.
The phone buzzed. Fuck, was it Yanic? I should have turned off the phone.
"It says the sender is Jensen? You have his number?"
"Um, yeah I got it today."
"Oh that's great! You're friends now?" She gushed.
"Yeah, I guess."
"It says 'Do you want to hang out sometime?' Oh you should invite him over to play games, then we can have dinner together!"
That sounds terrible. But I put on a smile and respond with, "Sure! That sounds fun."
"Oh I knew you'd make up, you always were-"
"I'm pretty tired. I didn't get that much sleep last night." I interrupted. "Could I go to my room?"
"I would rather your stay up here, but if you're tired.."
"Thanks, mom." I rush downstairs before she can protest more.
I close the door to my room and change into more comfortable clothes. I'm wearing an oversized muted green sweater and some baggy beige pants. I'm barefoot but have slippers in my room in I need them.
I go to the box. It's hidden under my bed, and contains books, clothes, and razors.
The razors are hidden under the clothes and books, but they are the most important thing in the box.
I make sure my door is locked and then hold a razor. When my sleeve is rolled up, you can see my arm. It has cuts, scars and welts. They cover almost every part of my arm, except for my wrist area. That would be too easily spotted and too dangerous. I find some healed scars and reopen them. That's what causes the welts.
When I'm satisfied with my work. I wipe my arm with a tissue and pull my sleeve back down.
I put the razor back into the box and cover it with the other stuff.
I then grab another box- this one has pieces of paper and random stuff. One side has the supplies, the other has the creations, and the sides are separated with a piece of cardboard.
On the creation side, there's mostly sculptures and decorated pieces of stuff, but there's also a tinfoil ball I got from Yanic when we first met. It's nothing special, but it holds the memory of us becoming friends. It was in kindergarten and we sat next to each other during craft time, that's when he gave me the tinfoil ball.
I think I'll keep it forever.
I fish out a kaleidoscope I found in the schools lost and found from my backpack and add it to the supplies section.
I'm too tired and my arm's too hurt for me to work on another creation, so I put the box back.
I lay down on my bed and let my mind drift into my thoughts and daydreams, and let myself fall asleep.
...
