Nothing like I have imagined

An Epic Love Story

I want an epic love story! Is that too much to ask for?

All the books that I have read have been pointing that I should be getting my love story anytime between last year and five years from now.

I have been breathing and living for all the romance books, shows, and movies. I have been prepared since I was 17 for either the mafia boss that will kidnap me and fall for me or the millionaire that will force me into a marriage of convenience, or honestly both , a love triangle is not my favorite trope but I can roll with it. Yet still there's no sign of anyone or anything. Other than the younger guys who think I'm their age and get disappointed at the end, there's literally nothing.

I'm on the verge of giving up on my happily ever after.

Were these books lying to me? Am I not main character material? Not meant for a killer love story?

If only life can give me a sign.

I'm almost 23 with two failed relationships, who to be honest and as bad as it might sound meant nothing to me. My future was put on hold because of two stupid army generals who thought it would be a very good idea to have a war in the middle of the country and destroy thousands of lives and kill even more people.

Now I'm left with nothing. No country, no house, no education, no love life, and not even a full set of panties.

I think I might have been Jenny Hmaphury in my previous life for this one to suck this much!

As I have been skipping between countries trying to find stability or a university that might take me in with all of my flaws and imperfections I also found out that as an almost 23 years old woman I dont know where my life is going or what am I going to do with it.

First thing first let's normalise not knowing anything or planning the future in your twenties. Despite the fact that all the social media baddies -who are 17-20 by the way- seems to be figuring life, getting money, and even having a very stable love life. But these mean nothing. We will blame it on the growth hormones stoked in their food. Twenty something year olds arent supposed to be ready for the future. We are just figuring it out. Trying to push through the high expectation from our families. our societies and even ourselves,

For once right nowI'm very much unemployed  with nothing to prove that I spent the last 5 years of my life studying medicine, no love life, and no idea what I'm eating for dinner tonight. But again, let's normalise it people! Its okay to not know anything about the future. Thats normal. I'm no God to know about the future.

Please anyone tell me its okay?

There's thousands and hundreds of people like me or maybe even with worse conditions trying to push through life and I know and believe that I'm way better than lots of people, yet someone tell me why am I sitting here having a crisis over the fact that I make no money and I might not become a doctor by 24. Even though I have everything that I want provided to me by my very accepting and loving parents. Travelling between two countries and living a life most people cant afford.

I guess humans will never really appreciate what they have until they lose it all.

We, Sudanese, didnt really know how lucky we were having our country. Always complaining and talking shit about the living situation, and now we dont even have that shitty country anymore.

It's funny how the decision of uneducated bone heads can destroy a whole country.

Anyways back to the main topic here.

I want an epic love story!