You know that girl that everyone wants to be? The one that all the guys are all “Weet woo” about? Yea so that ain’t me. And no, this isn’t another one of those teenage soap operas where they complain about being a loser and then they become popular then ride off with the man of their dreams on their white horse. No, this is a diffrent kindof story. The kind with love, hate, and everything in between.
Part 1:Going baccccck in time: Here comes the story: GO:
Ok so here’s my dealio so listen up because I’m only going through this once. My name is Shay Lennon Sparkfield. I got “Lennon” from none other but John Lennon. The fact that I was named after a man already kind of made me paranoid, but then the fact that he’s from like 6 centuries ago, back when the dinosaurs ruled the earth and strange bands like the “Beetles” were on music’s top hit list. Another thing that’s important about me is I just moved to California from the land of the dying A.K.A Florida. Yes, you heard me correctly. I moved from the land of the old people to the hottest state on the map where it’s all going on. Yes that sounds like a major improvement, going to a place where everyone isn’t over the age of 100, but truthfully it isn’t. I had to move to un-known territory. At least in Florida I knew that I didn’t have to dress up, everyone there is going blind anyway so it wouldn’t matter. But, here in California everything’s different. I have to go to a new school, make friends and all that jazz.
*Authors Note: I mean no harm to everyone who lives in Florida. I actually really like it there.
Story of my life, starring me Part 1: The Vicious Attack Barbies and 1-2 period drama take one, ACTION:
“Who made you Obama?” Yes, this was the exact phrase that came out of my mouth on the first day of sophomore year. Yes, quite the reputation builder I would say. So if you haven’t noticed I use this little thing called “sarcasm.” It’s an art that very few people obtain, and apparently the girl I said this to didn’t have the artist ability I was hoping for. “What did you like just like say to me like yeah?” If she had used ‘like’ one more time she might have gotten some kind of world record or something. My first class of the year and I’m already making “friends”, how fortunate. Ok so maybe my comment pushed the limit a little but when she told me to get away from her desk, and then later told me to move I just snapped. With her perfect Barbie doll face she turned to me with a look of rage and started to go all valley girl on me. “What like is like your problem like I just like told you like to move gosh!” Then she scampered off, probably to go tell her gossip circle that the new girl is a fire breathing dragon with six eyes and an attitude probably worst then the sass queen herself, Shenay Nay.
Ok so nothing happened in 1st period except for the “Barbie attack” and the ever so embarrassing “We have a new girl in our class” thing that teachers pull off. They must realize that that whole “introducing to the class” thing was invented by a moron who obviously was never a hormonal teenage girl who gets mortified if someone twitches there lip in a particular way that makes her think they hate her or think she’s fat. You’re probably thinking “No I wouldn’t think like that, I’m much smarter and better than Shay who is definitely over reacting!” Well Honey, that’s what you think. If this ever happens to you and you don’t freak out at all call me at 342-733-9803. No, I’m just kidding. I’m not actually giving you people my number, I’m much more intelgent than that. BTW I meant to spell intelligent wrong so don’t think you can get all sass queen with me.
“Ok class, please take your seats!” said my 2nd period teacher, Ms.Heightenwig. You’d think through time teachers could thing of a more interesting way to start they’re classes, like a song or a rap (yeah right) or at least a more interesting phrase like “You there take a seat gracias, digging the new weave Latisha, how’s the boyfriend Sherrie?” But no, they want to have the classic line that teachers have used for centuries on the 1st day of school, the very line that has introduced countless children to their worst nightmare… Learning!
