Old feelings-Seongjoong

Part 8

Word count: 700 words

Hongjoong's pov : 

"So what do u want to do now? I asked akwardly sitting on the edge of his bed. 

"I don't know , what do u want to do?" seongwha asked me as he came over and sat besides me on the bed. I stared at him once and all of a sudden I couldn't stop staring at him , he finally stared at me and the eye contact was killing me. why was he even looking at me like that? its not like he's gay , right?.

"Why do u look at me like that?" I asked him as I looked away. if I kept looking at him , I might have done something I would end up regreting.

"How do I look at u?" he said as he looked at me and I could feel his eyes on my lips .

"Like u wanna kiss me" I said turning back to him and realized he's way closer then I thought.

"What if I want to?" He asked as he looked at my eyes and then at my lips.

"U can't kiss me" seongwha I said getting up from the bed.

"Why can't I?" seongwha asked me in a confused and almost , upset tone?.

"Cause ur not gay seongwha , u literally bullied me for being gay" I said as I grabbed my bag and walked out of the room. I walked down the giant flight of stares and stared at elizabeth as she was gonna ask me something .

"Sorry I have to go elizabeth , I have some stuff to do and its getting late already. it was nice seeing u" I said as I smiled.

"It was nice seeing u to hongjoong" she said as she touched my shoulder and walked away with a smile on her face. I smiled at the thought of seeing her after so long but then faded by seeing seongwha standing on the top of the stairs staring down at me.

"Please don't go hongjoong , let me explain myself" Seongwha said as he started coming down the stairs.

"What do u even have to tell me seongwha , after all these years and everything u put me through?" I asked in a hurt tone.

"That I-" Seongwha said as he couldn't get the words out.

"That you what seongwha?" I asked as seongwha stared down at his maids that were now looking at us like we were crazy.

"U know what , forget it" seongwha said as he walked away to his room wiping his face.

Was seongwha crying? I thought to myself as I couldn't decide what to do. yes he hurt me all those years but I could atleast go up and listen to his explanation. I left my bags by the front door and made my way back up the stairs and went to seongwha's room and knocked on the door.

"Seongwha , are you okay?" I asked knocking on the door again.

"Im fine , what do u want?" Seongwha asked as I could hear him crying.

"Please let me in" I said as he went quiet and I heard shoveling around his room. The door got unlocked as I came in and saw seongwha going back over to his bed and wiping his tears. I close the door behind me and take a deep breathe before making my way to his bed.

"Explain it to me seongwha , what's wrong?" I asked him as I looked at him but he wouldn't stare at me back.

"I only did it cause I had internalized homophobia" Seongwha said quietly.

"What?" I said in a soft but confused tone.

"Im bisexual but I didn't like myself at the time and didn't accept that I was the way that i was. and then I started catching feelings for u and I didn't wanna put u through my discovery of what I like and what I don't. now i know who I am and i hate that i bullied you because of some fucked up shit I was going through , im sorry" he said as he was in tears at the end of his speech. I didn't even know what to say or how to even react , I just went silent.