QT: Against My Will (Volume 1)

[END] 2.83 - Her Version Of Hell - Mr. and Mrs. Jelly [END]

Spending her night in the bedroom which now felt like a cell, Bing Shi built her version of hell, she screamed into the pillow. Every ounce of her wished to throw herself off a building. To jump into the pits of the sea, to take a gun and place the cold metal down her throat, to pull the trigger, to shoot the pain away. She waited and waited...

Waited for the time when the pain would go away because they say...

'Give it time. Time will heal everything.'

On one side, she wanted to die. On the second side, she was afraid of death. On the third side, was the promise.

Bing Shi couldn't function normally. Whenever she looked, she saw traces of him. Everything reminded her of Xuan Mu.

She stopped working. All her days were spent in her bedroom, sleeping and doing nothing. She lost interest in everything, in her dreams and aspirations.

'If getting healed means forgetting you, then I choose to suffer my entire life.'

Xuan Mu was prepared. He sent psychologists to her and doctors to check on her health to monitor her, but not until she was alright.

People started to annoy her with constant questioning if she was alright. It was obvious that she wasn't!

She wanted to be alone! Why did they keep pestering her?

Xuan Mu forgot another thing. Bing Shi's adaptability was hidden deep inside her.

Wanting to get rid of the doctors, she learned to hide her emotions. She returned to be a pretty Bing Shi, with an exception, she lost the ability to genuinely smile and laugh.

The invisible pain tore her from inside. It didn't hurt as a cut or a bruise would. It was like a constant need to wipe away the non-existent tears that wanted to form but didn't.

After work, she would go home to take a shower. She would put on a lovely dress so she could visit Xuan Mu's grave in her best state, showing him that she was okay. Walking around the graveyard, she looked for the right rock to put on his tombstone.

Sitting next to the tombstone, she'd speak to Xuan Mu in her mind. Sometimes, she would place a blanket next to the tombstone to take a short nap. A doctor and guards would accompany her whenever she went out.

The only time she was alone was inside her house, and she enjoyed every moment of it. She could cry to her heart's content, pouring out all the piled-up feelings.

The routine repeated day after day.

Today was the same. Bing Shi took a nap next to Xuan Mu. The doctor and guards waited patiently for her to wake up. But it took her longer than usual. Feeling suspicious, Dr. Tzu checked her pulse.

There was none.

In a hurry, she tried to bring the girl back to life, unsuccessfully. Ignoring the little rocks placed neatly in a heart shape on Xuan Mu's grave, they brought her to the hospital.

Bing Shi died due to heart failure caused by an eating disorder. On a closer look, they noticed that in the past seven days, she stopped drinking and eating.

Some people always delivered food to her home. Nobody noticed. On the outside, she looked healthy, she didn't lose excessive weight, and her makeup was always exquisite.

Did she die a painful death? Was it attempted? Nobody knew.

Who would have thought that in the past, when Bing Shi was under enormous pressure and stress, she'd become anorexic? Her brain would fight hunger by lowering the pain. The first time she didn't listen to her mind but heart, she threw her survival instincts out of the window.