Yeah im bored.
Stoner: Sweet dog you got there.
Police: Yes, this is our new drug sniffing dog.
Stoner: Still training huh?
Police: What do you mean?
Stoner:
Stoner: Never mind.
Bro: I can't believe we have to be stuck in this room together!
Ninja, swallowing the key: Truly unfortunate.
Player, playing a video game: How do I play?
*Player has drawn first blood!*
*Player is on a killing spree!*
*Player is on a rampage!*
*Player is unstoppable!*
*Player is dominating!*
*Player is godlike!*
Player: Don't worry guys, I figured it out.
Captain: Look, Stoner, it's the third time this week you had a mental breakdown and it's Monday.
Gnome: Nothing feels better than winning Monopoly. Not love, not sex, not free pizza, nothing!
Captain: I'm sorry, have you tried pizza?
Gnome: Yes, and it doesn't compare to owning half the board and watching the light die from your friend's eyes as you take their money and feel your friendship slowly deteriorate.
Dum : I like you.
Dum : Can I have a private talk with you?
Player: Okay, as long as it's not about tampons because I just don't understand them.
Engineer : I love sarcasm! It's like punching people in the face, but with words!
TheGentlemen: Tell me a little about yourself.
Captain : I'd rather not, I really like this group.
Gnome: Look, babe! It's the good Kush!
Engineer : It's the dollar store, how good can it be?
*the Squad at Disneyland, in the teacups*
TheGentlemen, Mother, and Mr. Egg: *spinning a little and talking*
Veteran , Player, and Captain: *flying past them, spinning as fast as they can, screaming*
TheGentlemen: I just had a long talk with Mr. Cheese
and Mr. Egg about hitting and now they are yelling "it's my turn to perpetuate the cycle of violence" before hitting each other.
TheGentlemen: How much you wanna bet Gnome got a Lap dance from Engineer ?
Mr. Egg: If that happened, Captain can drink free tonight.
Captain : As much as I love the thought of having free drinks I don't like the idea of Gnome receiving a Lap dance from anyone.
TheGentlemen: Hey Engineer , did you give Gnome a lap dance?
Engineer : So what if I did?
TheGentlemen, to Mr. Egg: I guess Captain is drinking free tonight.
Engineer : Be right back, I'm gonna go cry-
Gnome, entering the room: What the f-
Captain: I made lightly fried fish fillets for dinner.
Veteran: Captain , It's 1:15 am, what the fuck.
Captain: Do you want the lightly fried fish fillets or not.
Veteran: Well, I mean yeah.
Captain: So come downstairs while they're still hot.
Veteran: Wait, you just made them?
Captain: Yeah, I wasn't tired so I decided to make lightly fried fish fillets.
Veteran: Say lightly fried fish fillets one more time Captain.
Goober: Who else is hiding in the laundry room trying to listen to Bro and Ninja's convo?
Angel: Me. I'm in the laundry basket.
Stoner: I'm in the washing machine.
Veteran : I'm in the closet.
Angel: We accept you Veteran <3
Veteran : No I'm literally in the closet.
Angel: Love is love! <3
Engineer : I hate to say 'I told you so'—
Captain : No, you don't. You would marry 'I told you so' and have a baby with it and buy adjoining burial plots.
Mr. Cheese, holding a scooter: TheGentlemen! Can I go outside and play with this?
TheGentlemen: Sure, whatever. I'm not your parent, okay?
Mr. Cheese, running outside: Thanks TheGentlemen!
TheGentlemen, running out after them and screaming: NOT ON THE STREET! STAY AWAY!
Engineer : Is there anyone here who's actually straight?
Bro: *raises hand*
Ninja: *puts his hand down*
Stoner: sapnu puaS.
Player: What??
Captain : What language is that.
Stoner: Turn your phone 180 degrees.
*Stoner was removed from the groupchat*
Veteran : You ever see something that changes your life and you're just like "huh.."
Captain : I saw you.
Veteran : Honestly that's so cute and sweet but it kinda makes this awkward because I was gonna show you a picture of Player in a turkey costume...
Gnome: I feel so burnt out.
Veteran : Don't worry, it'll be over soon.
Gnome: Are you gonna... assassinate me?
Veteran : Well not if you're expecting it.
Ninja: Am I going to far?
Captain : No, no, no. You went too far about 7 hours ago. Now you're going to prison.
TheGentlemen: Do you guys ever have a civilized conversation that doesn't require insulting each other every time you get a chance?
Mr. Cheese: No.
Mr. Egg: No.
TheGentlemen: Didn't think so.
