See you next Saturday

Joy

I didn't cry so I counted it as a win. Just my luck though, my first day of school and it went to literal shit. Only I, Joy Marshall would get garbage dumped on me in the middle of the lunch room.

When I looked into the janitors eye's though I couldn't be angry. He looked terrified and guilty. He spoke very little English and kept saying sorry over and over again. It wasn't his fault, he didn't mean to, but nonetheless everyone was still laughing at me and I looked like a fool in front of my three new friends and you know, intent vs outcome.

Besides that my day had actually been pretty okay. Eve and I got along instantly and when she introduced me to Jaz and Stockton I felt right at home.

I had never had that before. I always felt like an outsider with my old friends and it was only solidified when none of them really cared when I moved.

Eve, Jaz, and Stockton were cool though. Eve was super smart, and a bit of a troublemaker. She had got detention for spray painting "Racist asshat" on one of the football players lockers. The school didn't mind her defending herself against racists but vandalizing school property was a big no no. Jaz was very laidback and chill. She was on the dance team and was constantly tapping her feet or humming a song. And Stockton was all smiles and laughs. He was a big computer nerd but also the class clown. A lot of people would pat his shoulder and wave at him as we walked by.

I stare in the mirror at my spaghetti stained shirt. I look horrific. I'm about to give in and head home when the bathroom door swings open.

"Hi." A blonde girl stands by the door holding a tote bag.

"Um, Hey."

"I saw what happened back there. I'm so sorry about that, and on your first day..."

"Yeah, not one of my finest moments." Understatement of the century.

"I have an extra pair of sweats that I always keep in my locker if you need something to wear." She holds out the tote bag for me to take.

"Oh thanks..."

"Bella. Bella Farmington."

"Joy." I take the tote bag.

"Yeah, I know. Word travels fast around here." She says and I had no doubt that what she said was true.

"Well thanks Bella. I really appreciate it. I'll wash them and give them back tomorrow."

She scrunches her nose. "Oh no need. I needed an excuse to have my parents buy me more so you're really doing me a favor."

"Oh well then you're welcome." I awkwardly laugh as she just stares at me confused. "Weird joke, sorry."

"Okay well, it was nice to formally meet you Joy, try to stay out of garbage from here on out." She smiles and leaves.

That was fucking weird. I can't tell if she was being passive or not but she lent me clothes and for that I was thankful.

After changing I step out of the restroom where a worried looking Stockton is standing.

"Joy are you okay? Jaz and Eve had to run to class and I'm a guy or I would've come and checked on you."

"I'm good. Just a bruised ego but I'll survive." I smile lamely.

"Don't worry, by 7th period people will be talking about something else, where'd you get the extra pair of clothes?" Stockton says as we start walking towards our next class.

"Her name was Bella, she seemed nice enough."

"Oh yeah Bella, she's sweet. Captain of the cheer team. A bit of an airhead but harmless. Her boyfriend however is a tool. Kurt Ashcraft. Stay away. The guy does throw pretty epic parties though, you should come with us this weekend!"

I think I'd rather stick my hand in a blender than go to a high school party. "I don't know, parties aren't really my vibe."

"Cmon it should be fun, we don't go often but Jaz likes to make an appearance every so often because most of the dance team goes."

I should. I need to put myself out there more. And I finally have friends, I should jump at the offer to hangout with them, lame party or not.

"Okay, I'll think about it."

"Sweet! You won't regret it...probably." Stockton winks.

Yeah we'll see about that.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Stockton was right, by 7th period everyone had moved on from my lunchroom incident and were talking about this Kurt guy and the football game this weekend.

"Need a ride home?" Jaz asked as we walked out of our final class of the day.

"Nah I'm good I'm close by, thanks though." I smile.

We say our goodbyes and I start walking home.

As I walk in the house a feeling of relief washes over me.

One day finished, way too many more to go.

Every time I walk out of my house I feel like I need to put on a facade. I've always wanted to be liked and I spend so much time trying to navigate all of my actions so they're suitable for everyone around me.

It's exhausting. And though it was nice to be able to be myself around my three new friends I still felt this weight on my shoulders the entire time like I was going to do something wrong.

Because no matter how hard I tried I always ended up disappointing people in the end.

By the time Dad got home I had made dinner, canned soup and store-bought breadsticks and set the table.

"How was school? Make any new friends." My dad asked as we sat down to eat.

"Yeah actually, three new friends, they're all really nice." I said, happy I didn't have to lie about it.

Dad looked at me and smiled. Actually smiled. The first genuine smile I've seen him sport in a long time and it made me want to go and hug him.

"I'm so glad. I know everything has been crazy this past year but we can do hard things. With the whole-" Is he going to open up? Is this it?

He stops and shakes his head.

"I'm just happy you have some friends!" He smiles.

Not today I guess. Maybe tomorrow, but probably not.