what's up, my gang! You already know who I am. My name is Jambo! Yeah. You prolly see me round, with my sick ass outfits and shit! I actually have never told my life story, and HOLY SHIT, you ain't seen anything like this, lemme tell you! This is gonna be a wild ride, folks, so buckle the fuck up and enjoy this Rollercoaster of fuckin badassery!!
So, this all started when my Ma popped me outta her. It was like, "fweeeewwwh," like I legit SHOT OUT! but that's irrelevant. After I was born, i was all slimy and shit, so my Pa decided to get the hell outta there. Can't blame him though, i was one slippery fella! Oh, yeah, my Pa was named Gerald the Destroyer. We all called him Jerry, though.
Anyways, Ma popped out a few more little shitheads, and we all got names and shit. At the time, I wasn't the amazing Jambo. I was named Mush. We got Mush, Gush, and Stink. Gush was my sister, and Stink was my brother. I love 'em, but they never visit me anymore! Those assholes.
So after me and the crew were all cleaned up, one of those big meaty guys came in with weird blue things on their hands and grabbed us. Ma got pissed, but they literally did not give a shit. Like, they actually just fuckin grabbed us and took us to this giant metal thing. Still have no clue what it was, but that's okay.
