Living with a bipolar:

Mickeys eyes opened slowly, he did a couple hard blinks as he was adjusting to the brightness of the room. The sun was beaming through a small crack in the curtains, Mickey twisted his body round in the opposite direction of how he was sleeping.he was expecting to see his boyfriends bright green eyes and freckled face staring back at him, but he wasn't? He was actually turned the other direction his torso rising and falling steadily. It was 9am and usually by this time ian would have been up like 2 hours and gone on a run,it was a Sunday so neither on the boys had work so Mickey didn't think deep into it, they had stayed out late the night before and honestly he was pretty relieved ian was still sleeping coz he had been quite restless the last couple nights.

Mickey rubbed his eyes and leant over to Ian kissing him gently on his bare shoulder. The black - haired man stumbled out the door,closing it behind him, he intended for it to be quiet but Mickeys always been heavy handed so the door closed with a thud. Mickey scrunched up his face and waited to hear Ian complain, but silence.

He continued into the kitchen to grab a beer and then slumped onto the couch still exhausted from last night.

After a couple hours later Mick realised it was almost noon and his boyfriend still hadn't woken up. He made his way into the now  shared bedroom of the milkovich house and ian was still laying facing the wall.
"Hey, sleepy face, come on man it's noon"
"Ummmh" the orange haired boy groaned.
A flash of concern passed mickeys face. "Ian come on you gotta eat and shower"
"Please?" He whispered.
Ian just shook his head."go away" his voice low and breathy.
Mickey knew what was happening.

"Ian, ....you ok?" Mickey spoke spoke soft and quietly, almost so quiet Ian couldn't hear him. It wouldn't matter if he did ian didn't answer anyway. Mickey didnt know how to rlly act when Ian was like this. Which is kind of surprising because it's happened a few times since Ian's diagnosis. It's been ALOT of trial and error, he at least knows now that throwing a pillow at his head doesn't work too well.

Mickey perched on the edge of the bed and rubbed Ian's freckly back in circular motions.
Ian slightly shrugged Mickeys hand off him so he stopped, and his heart sank.
"Okay,....it's ok" he muttered. He tried rlly hard not to get angry at situations like this.ian didn't like talking about it at all so Mickey never asked about what he should do when he's like this, he kinda just has to wait it out and hope it gets better not worse. Realising that staying was just going to upset Ian more, he left.

After another hour of sitting in the living room Mickey heard a small voice coming from the bedroom. "Mick?..." it was weak and raspy, Mickey got up immediately and attended to his boyfriend. "Hey , what's up?" Ian was now sat up on the bed looking out the window. Mickey came and sat next to him and rubbed the back on his neck. Ian avoided eye contact and kept looking outside. He didn't want to look. Couldn't look.He knew as soon as he saw the pain on Mickeys face he would break."I'm sorry...." Ian's voice cracked as he said this. "Hey,no.. look at me" Mickey cupped Ian's face in his hands. They were now eye to eye. Mickey shuck his head slightly and said,
"your not allowed to be sorry for something you can't control ian"
Ian looked down and mickey grabbed his hands.
" I love you" it was almost inaudible Ian said said it so quiet. Mickey looked back at his wounded boyfriend. "I know.... Love you too"and forced out a slight smile. They just sat like that for a minute, it wasn't awkward Mickey was just happy Ian was letting him stay this time.

Suddenly ian winced then let out a small groan "oh shit-" he said as he got up as fast as he could. He was running to the bathroom and Mickey followed close behind,
as Ian puked into the toilet Mickey rubbed his back and looked away.
"You're alright, you're ok" Mickey just kept repeating these soft spoken words. Ian was doubled over the toilet looking so fragile and small. Mickey actually looked bigger than him. Usually mick hated being smaller , but not when it was during an episode like this. "What's wrong with me" ian whispered into the bowl of the toilet. Mickey was quite taken back by this, he said nothing for about 30 seconds then crouched next to him. Ian looked into his deep blue eyes that were now glazed over with tears. Mickey swallowed the lump in his throat-
"noth-" mickey stopped himself, he couldn't lie.
"Your sick bby"
Tears started flowing down Ian's face and he struggled to catch his breath. The pain Mickey felt seeing the love of his life so down and sad, and literally couldn't do anything about it broke him.
"Will I get better?" Ian genuinely asked.
He trusted Mickey with his life and knew he could get a truthful answer from him. Not all the bullshit the therapy sessions say.
And of course mick wasn't a professional but he had done as much research as possible to try and help him.
"It will get easier," Mickey said trying to avoid a straight answer because no, it wouldn't get easier.
'40 years on medication' is what the doctor told them.
Ian slumped into his boyfriends shoulder and mickey wrapped his arms round him tight.
They sat there for a minute until they knew Ian was done being sick.
" come on let's get you back to bed"
Mickey cleaned Ian up and guided him back to the bed. Ian's vision was blurry with tears as he climbed onto the unmade bed. Mickey when to the kitchen to grab a bucket from under the sink just incase he wouldn't make it to the toilet. He came back in the room and set the bucket next to Ian's side of the bed, he also brought in two gatorades and set them down.
"Your meds must be unbalanced again, that's why you're thew up, ...rest today then I'll take you to the clinic Tom " Mickey kissed Ian on his head then realised how clammy he was.
"are you hot?"  Mickey questioned.
Ian nodded and so Mickey went over to open the window and let some air In. Honestly this was to help get rid of the smell of vomit too.

Mickey helped ian into bed then lay down himself. "You'll be ok Gallagher"
He moved Ian's orange hair out this face and Ian blinked slowly, he was falling asleep. Mickey carried on just gently sweeping his hair back while Ian's eyes slighted rolled back, he was fighting  to stay awake and went to apologise again " Mick I'm so-"
"Shh, you need rest Ian" mickey ran his fingers over Ian's eyes closing them himself. That was enough for Ian to give in and let himself sleep.
This was also when Mickey let the tears start. They rolled down his check and made a wet puddle on his pillow. He tried to hide his shaky breathing small sniffs as best he could, luckily Ian was out cold. He hated this .everything about it. It wasn't fair.

Eventually Mickey fell asleep with is damaged boyfriend in his arms.
Just hoping tomorrow would be a little easier...