this is THE jascob famfic ever tbh...

Its just show businesses babe.

It was an early Monday morning for the manager of Figure 5, they wore their usual job outfit at work, glasses, jeans and a green button up. They enjoyed a freshly brewed coffee, so good that they already craved for another. After that, they immediately drove to their office, ready to start a new business day. Their office was quite small, but this didn't make it any less comfortable, the desk had the essentials, paper clips, pens and pencils of various colours, even a framed picture of their lovely dog. The walls of the office were tinted with light mint green, radiated by the light bulb so shiny that could be considered brighter than the sun.

Once set on his chair, they turned on their computer and checked all their social medias for updates. The boy band Figure 5 spiked in popularity after the recent revelation of a new ship, Kymie, and the premature baldness of one of the members. But that wasn't enough, they needed more. They needed to find a way to raise their streaming numbers before Figure 5's newest single would come out.

Knowing the internet the streaming numbers would always skyrocket whenever anything notorious would happen to the group. Their all time high was when #Kymie was trending.

"Ah! That's it..!" They exclaimed to themselves, they had gotten a quite clever idea in their not so humble opinion. If Kymie had worked, perhaps they could push towards, reach new horizons... they surely could affor another two members to be in a relationship. So they decidere to call them in for a quick brainstorm.

"So.. why am I here? I have other things to deal with." Jason, the black hood of his hoodie pressed tight over his head, grumbled. He sat across from the manager.

"Jason, take off your hood, everyone who hasn't lived under a rock knows about your issues with...you know...the lack of hair." Said the manager. Jason reluctantly complied and took off his hood.

He's been emotionally suffering, due to all the terrible luck he's had for the last few weeks.

First of all, he loses his title of "Hottest Figure 5 Member" to Kyle, he didn't even know that Kyle was actually part of the group!
Secondly, he's lost his oh-so precious hair because Jacob paid the stylist to shave his head. Luckily for him, his hair has started to grow back, so all he had left was a weirdly grown buzz cut.

Accompanied by Jacob, sat on the chair next to him Jason.

"I could ask the same thing, why did you bring me here?" Jason asked bitterly.

"Mhh.." The manager took a sip of their yet another coffee. "I'm glad you asked. Now, you two are aware of how popular Kymie is, right?" They asked, it was rhetorical question, everyone and their mothers knew how popular Kymie was. The two group members nodded, but also Jacob rolled his eyes at the mention of Kymie. Always about Kyle, Jamie and that stupid ship Kymie, ugh!

"Yeah..? How does that relate to us?" Jason asked.

"As you two know, soon, our newest single: 'Baby, even though our relationship may be parasocial, I love you!' Is releasing soon, we need to.. hype it up, as people your age would say-"

"Just say what you're getting at! I don't have all day!" Jason interrupted.

The manager took another sip of their coffee, at this point wishing it was a liquor flask.

"I need you two do the same thing, become a couple, so the figureens can ship you guys. But this is just gonna happen for the public eye. No real dating involved." As the manager finished their sentence, they expected one of the guys, maybe even both, to start to argue.

"Hah. No waaay in a billion years am I going to pretend to date Mr. Bald-o over here-" Jacob got cut off.

"The only reason I'm bald is because YOU paid the stylist to do that!" He yelled at Jacob, his reputation was ruined ever since he was bald, everyone was calling his Baldson, even his own family! If he heard the nickname Baldson yet again he would commit something worthy of the death row penalty.

Jacob chuckled mischievously, knowing damn well he triggered his reaction.

"Yeah, I don't regret it one bit, Baldson!" He replied calmly, seeing Jason so upset was hilarious to Jacob.

"Ugh- I don't understand how you got into this group! You're always doing something to me! Innocent, handsome and funny me!"

"Pfft- Dude- You're more delusional than the figureens thinking kymie is actually real."

The manager cleared their throat, which basically meant "shut the fuck up". Jacob and Jason gulped and both looked back that their manager.

"Alright well.. you two are going to do this whether you like it or not. So please, get out of my office, and if I don't see Jarcson or whatever the.. uh.. ship name will be.. trending on social media by next week, neither of you will be in the music video of the newest single."

"What! Y-you can't do that!" Jason interrupted.

"I can do whatever I want son. Now please leave." The manager said.