Poetry by a girl just like You

1. D e a r M o m

2/7/14

Dear mom,

I'm sorry if I talk too much,

I'm just trying to make up for all of

the lost time,

Calls you Ignored,

Christmas's in hotel rooms,

New years that felt the same as the

years before without you.

Because I needed you,

I needed my mother,

When I felt no feelings

When I was confused

When I felt like dying,

The horrible mothers days,

It was the three years of my life that

felt like an eternity.

Because, Before I left you were different,

And now that I'm back your angry,

because you had to leave your fancy

lifestyle sipping assortments of

expensive wines,

To get your daughter back in a stable home,

'No, scratch that, you didn't have to leave,

Because to you money is better than love,

They say the world doesn't revolve

around money, but sadly it does.

And There's been,

To many salty tears,

Suicidal thoughts,

Broken dreams,

Hurtful words,

There's only so much a person can take and its driving me insane,

Because I want to die

No I NEED TO DIE.

But I don't wanna die.

Is this insanity?

Dear mom,

Please don't cry when you find my body in the tub,slits on my wrists, covered in my blood head to toe,

And if you wonder why i did it,

It wasn't your fault,

It was the stress

It was the constant feeling of loneliness,

Me wanting to someone who I could never be,

It was the hopelessness,

I already knew things weren't getting better for me,

Those three years that faltered my mind,

7 years without my father,

4 years of beatings,

One year of neglect,

3 years without you

14 years of,

Pain,

Confusion,

Scars,

Bruises,

and blood.

You seen him hit me,

Hell he hit you himself,

And I still don't know why...

Why didn't you believe me when I told you,

But I guess it was denial

Why did you slap me when I said I hated him,

Why?

Why didn't you believe me?

But we often ask 'Why' when we already know the answer

Dear mom,

Please don't cry when you find my body in the tub,slits on my wrists, covered in my blood from head to toe,

Please don't wonder why,

Because you already freaking know.

© Kala Clayton 2/7/14