Son of Hope

Chapter Twenty One - Hurt and Bitter

I knelt hollowly next to Catherine in the church. She carried a boy, another boy who was robbed from us only this time a small part of me did blame her. That small part chattered away so loudly that if she had just stayed home in her condition then we would soon have another son. she reached to grab my hand but I snatched it away.

We would get past this, I know would we would get past this, that my anger for her could not last long and we were both raw in our feelings. but right now, right now what I had envisioned, what i was so sure would be different between brothers is playing out rather than my dream.

I exited mass first and went to write a letter, I needed guidance, one that the council could not offer me. Hope was lost and I needed some of that right now. With no mother to lean on, my favourite Aunt would be just as good. Once the request was sent i went back to my daily business.

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I sat feasting with some members of the council, they all talked joyously about our victories and France. But i was to busy wallowing in my own self pity and grief, to pay that much attention or to take part.

"His grace led a brilliant attack."

"I'll raise a toast to it!" Catherine's voice broke me out of my own world as I sat back in my chair and glanced at her.

"The Queen too, she had a victory." Boleyn added

"You mean a loss." I huffed out. I know that was below the belt and I know i would come to regret it later on but that was for later on. It went silent.

"Indeed. But now we must look to the future. We must remember that peace is much less costly to the royal purse than war." Wolsey stood blathering on.

"The King has silenced France, Wolsey. He has won the war." Catherine countered

"Yes, he has. But now we must consider who our European allies are." I huff out a breath, this man while a great tutor in my boyhood began to wear on me as an adult.

"We are clear on who our allies are, chaplain. Despite our grievances with Ferdinand, Spain remains our ally." Catherine countered as their battle of words began with one another.

"Your Grace, your father Ferdinand, cannot be rewarded for his treachery. That would make the King look weak." I slam my hand on the table

"Speak another condescending word to my wife I will have your head or worse your balls Wolsey." I pointed at him annoyed at his tone. Grief and bad mood aside that was no way to speak to her. "Apologise." he bowed in submission

"My Apologies your grace."

"Both of you will cease talking with one another, till I say other wise. I tire of your arguments my head aches with your incessant bickering. Brother pass me the ale so i might drown it out." he poured me a cup.

"Your majesty. might I suggest dissolving the marriage between your sister Mary to your nephew Charles and match her instead with King Louis. To make our peace with France." he sat himself down as Stafford let out a mix between a laugh and a scoff.

"Did you catch syphilis from some French whore? Is this the fever talking?" he questioned. Catherine gave a nervous laugh before going to stand. I held her hand down and she remained seated.

"Queen Catherine has worked tirelessly to maintain Charles and Mary's betrothal. A betrothal that was requested and agreed by my father while he was still alive. She is not a peace of meat to be thrown to the highest bidder. Will you shut up."

"Your Grace. Your Aunt, Princess Elizabeth, the Duchess of Oxford is here." my groom told me and stepped aside revelling my Aunt. for the first time since losing my unborn son, i smiled.

"Aunt Lizzie." I stood from my chair

"Your Grace." she curtsied as I brought her into my embrace which she gladly returned.

"Leave us, all of you." I tell everyone in my company. Then turn back to my Aunt, there was a scraping of chairs as everyone left the two of us alone "Come, let me pour you a drink."

"You're such a kind nephew." She smile sitting down as I poured her a cup of wine and handed it to her and sitting down beside her

"I'm glad you're here Aunt Lizzie." she took my hand

"Your letter sounded urgent and full of sorrow. I came as quickly as possible. What troubles you dear nephew." I place my other hand on top of hers. "Are your nightmares back."

"If only they were, they would be confined to my head. I'm living this one." I admitted "What I saw happening to Harry is happening to me. Pain and grief of losing children, none of them surviving long. It counters everything I dreamt the night before father died." She slid her cup away and place her second hand on top of mine.

"Oh, my dearest nephew. It pains me to see you in such a state."

"After all the things I have seen, that has been done to change the future, how can this be happening. First a miscarriage, then little Henry not even surviving the year. now a boy stillborn early. I thought you and mother manage to lift the curse."

"We did, I saw it as I slept, your mother, grandmother, great grandmother and myself broke the cycle pleaded with Melusina to stop and she did. This is not the curse of our making." she assured me

"Is it a curse then? One of some other design?" I question and she sighed

"There is only one way to find out. I learnt of how mother came to be with your uncles. Breaking the cycle of no sons. Are you willing to try the same?"

"Anything, please help me, Lizzie."