Five years down the road...
It's amazing what you're free to grab ahold of when you let go of the things that are holding you back.
I still saw Abigail saying no to my original marriage proposal every day. That dead, pained look in her eyes, the light going out completely as she finally reached her limit with me. But I was grateful for that no because it finally forced me to let go of the destruction left behind by my first marriage to Charlotte. It made me wake up and start looking at Abigail as a fresh, new relationship, not as the woman following a terrible circumstance.
I'd almost lost Abigail forever because I couldn't get past the horrors of my first marriage to Charlotte and all the deceit and pain associated with it. I'd carried Charlotte forward into my relationship with Abigail and because I couldn't let go of it, Abigail had ultimately let go of me. She'd thought I was in mourning for a beloved wife when nothing could be further from the truth. I loved Abigail like I'd never loved a woman before in my life -- it was just my execution of showing her that love that failed so miserably. I didn't blame her in the least for leaving; I just wondered why she hadn't given up on me sooner.
When Abigail left town and wouldn't tell my sister where she was, Katie had had to talk me out of hiring a PI to find Abby so I could go to her. She advised me to be patient and wait for Abigail to return. As difficult and horrible as my marriage to Charlotte had been, it was nothing compared to those months without my Abigail.
Months I wasn't sure I could have survived had I not medicated myself with alcohol to numb the pain Abigail had left behind. Had I known she was pregnant, I would have hired the PI anyway, against Katie's advice, and planted myself right in front of Abby.
I made up my mind that I would become the man she would say yes to eventually, just as soon as I could prove to her that I was ready to love her the right way. So I worked on myself while she was gone, stopped drinking, stopped drunk calling her and got myself free from Roger. Made a plan...that got blown to hell when she called and told me she was pregnant. Thinking it was another man's, my heart plummeted until she snapped and told me that it was my baby.
I couldn't get to her fast enough. And once I could finally tell her all of the secrets I'd been keeping, once I could explain the reality of my marriage to Charlotte, I saw a softening in her, but I still needed to show her I knew the right way to treat her.
As the woman who ruled my heart.
Now, about five years later, I grinned over at my wife, my left hand holding Griffin's right hand, his other hand held tightly in Abigail's hand. I held our three-year-old daughter, Maelie, in my arms because she was a huge daddy's girl and why walk when daddy was there to carry you? It also provided a much better view than being on the ground. Besides, the baby in Mommy's tummy kicked sometimes and the little princess didn't like it, so daddy's arms for the win.
Our third child, due in just four short months, was a boy, and we were calling it a day when Brioc was born. I'd been happy with however many children Abigail wanted and she walked around saying three was a nice, even number of children to have.
The first -- and only -- time I'd pointed out that three wasn't an even number, she'd laughed as if I was being the ridiculous one. "You know what I mean, Kade."
And I kind of did? At least I pretended to. But the important thing was, if Abby wanted three children, we'd have three children, even number or not.
Griffin was excited about his first day of kindergarten. We'd been hyping it up to him and he'd loved the backpack I'd found for him with all the zippers and secret compartments. He looked grown up in his uniform of blue shorts and white shirt, his hair short and spiky.
