I Will Rake Away The Fallen Leaves Of Last Summer's Pain

Chapter 2

Trigger warning for trauma, self harm, blood and heavy emotions during the first half of this chapter!!
Nothing graphic or deeply descriptive
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It was silent it the car. All Jake could hear was the tires against the road, quietly rumbling across the highway. The sun was setting when he was finally able to take the exit. He wanted to put the radio on, but he was too afraid. Afraid he'd stumble over the local news on accident; so he stopped his finger when it was about to press the button. Neytiri lifted her head, briefly, when she noticed him move, then she went back to sleep, huddled up in her blanket. She had been sleeping the entire drive.

The sunlight was reflecting against the windows of buildings passing them by. He had to stop at a red light and pulled the sunblock down, so he wouldn't have to squint his eyes so much. He had forgotten his sunglasses in the hotel room, he remembered. The other cars' roaring engines accompanied him. But Jake strangely felt like he was all alone in the world; with no knowledge or power of his own.

He risked a glance into the rearview mirror. Lo'ak had his headphones in and was mindlessly scrolling through his phone. Every now and then, he typed something on the display. Kiri was on the seat behind him, cuddling with her sister. They were both sleeping as well. Neteyam was sitting next to his brother and staring out the window. He had his legs pressed close to his upper body, and he was absently chewing on his nails. Jake felt a painful sting in his chest when he saw the bruises on his face; some had been patched up with band-aids. Neytiri had put a blanket around him before they left, but it slipped off his shoulders; his facial expression was stone-cold. Not even his eyes followed the movement of the other vehicles.

Jake knew that faraway look. He'd seen it many times when he was with the marines. Suddenly, he started to feel sick again. The urge to just open the door and throw up on the damn street. But the traffic light turned green, and he stepped on the gas pedal instead. He swallowed the nausea building up in his throat and kept driving. Right now, it was the most sane thing to do.

They all got startled awake when the driver right next to them honked. Jake had been so lost in thought, he almost swiveled into a different lane. He took a deep breath and ran a hand across his face. Eventually, they arrived at the suburbs. It would just be another couple turns until they were home. Jake wasn't sure if he was supposed to feel relieved or depressed in that moment.

He woke up Neytiri – who had fallen asleep again – and she helped him getting the kids out of the car. She carried Tuk upstairs right away after unlocking the front door, while he got the heavy suitcases out of the trunk with a grunt. Lo'ak and Kiri were entrusted with carrying them inside; they both did so without complaining. Meanwhile, Jake opened the door where Neteyam was sat.

"Hey, kid.", he greeted with a small smile, hoping to gain at least a small reaction out of him. Neteyam just looked at him with a blank face and quickly removed his fingers from his mouth; his nails looked horrible, like he'd been chewing on them the entire time.

"Hey, dad.", his son quietly rasped. He didn't meet his eyes.

"How's the pain? Should I get your meds?", Jake asked as calmly as possible. Inside, he wanted to scream, load his weapon and drive back to shoot every single person who had been at that party. Without hesitation. They still haven't found the suspects. He'd never been met with so much incompetence before in his life.

"Are your legs sore? Mine sure are. Do you need help getting out?"

Neteyam vehemently shook his head with furrowed brows and climbed out of the seat, but his knees gave up under him and Jake hat to catch him so he wouldn't fall.