Lust Is Friendship

Chapter 1: Intrusive Thoughts

For as long as she'd known him, Kajol always knew there was just something about Shah Ruhk. It was the way they met. The way he didn't instantly love her like everyone else did. The way he saw her was loud, annoying, and domineering. It was something about when the camera started rolling for them both...The chemistry and attraction was undeniable. Not only to themselves but to any and everyone that has ever seen them on the big screen.

In secret, Kajol pined for him. In every film they had done together, she would always have tremendous lust and an overwhelming desire to get to scenes where his lips were on her shivering skin, or when he would pull her close and caress her body lovingly, Kajol loved most of all when he looked at her with those illuminating eyes. She believed Shah Rukh's eyes held all the secrets of the world. If only he knew for decades, they held the secret to her heart.

Now, Kajol was in her 40s thinking of Shah Rukh as she always did. A sigh escaped her lips and she squeezed her pillow tighter for comfort and consolation. She was currently wide awake and the time was 3 AM. Some nights she just couldn't sleep perplexed about what she could have done differently in terms of telling Shah Rukh how bad she craved him. She already knew the answer.

Nothing.

It was always best to keep it to herself.

Shah Rukh has always been a devoted husband and father. That was something she admired about him. Shah Ruhk in her eyes was the poster boy for a good wholesome man. Kajol was envied for getting to him first. If only Kajol herself met him sooner; maybe just maybe her book of life would have been written differently.

"You can't sleep again?"

Lost in her thoughts Ajay's voice caused Kajol to jump in fright. She turned her body to face her husband who still had his eyes closed. Kajol was also up last night with these thoughts that haunted her. She knew Ajay couldn't really sleep if she didn't. Not that her being up at night mentally weighed on him. It's not like he couldn't sleep because his wife's mind was racing. It's just that he was a light sleeper. Every time Kajol moved or even breathed out of place he noticed.

"I'm sorry sweetheart. I don't mean to keep you up." Kajol murmured to her husband apologetically.

The last thing she wanted to do was wake Ajay up. Waking Ajay up at times was like poking a sleeping bear. Never try to do it. He was already cranky and evil-looking enough in the daytime. Ajay was an amazing father, but a subpar husband. Ajay never loved Kajol in the ways she wanted or needed to be loved. He never cared to know her on the deepest level like a husband should. He didn't even know her love language. He damn well couldn't even remember her birthday or their wedding anniversary like he should... but Shah Ruhk always knew. Without hesitation either.

"Well, you are!" He raised his voice quietly. Finally he opened his eyes to shoot daggers at his wife. Rarely ever did Kajol have to put forth effort for her husband to find her a bother or annoying. 80% of the time he was abrasive.

"Do you mind holding me so I can go to sleep?" Kajol expressed noiselessly, but of course, he heard her.

With a sign, Ajay laid flat letting her cuddle up to his chest. Kajol brought her body together to make herself small. She closed her eyes tightly as if she were a small child whose parent's told her to go to bed that instant.

Slowly, but surely Ajay was asleep again. Leaving Kajol to her intrusive thoughts until she fell asleep.