Death Queue as it should be

Wednesday full of bullshit

12:40 PM

Well here we are.

Fucked up and in desperate need of some alcohol and an ass kicking face off.

Of course I'd rather just get up in the middle of the night to go get myself wasted as I can and then punch a random person who throws me a bad look, but apparently I'm still too young to do that.

Honestly this whole "you're still too young to do shit" thing pisses me off.

When were we ever too young to get insecure about every single move we make?

When was I ever too young to hate myself so much that I would randomly get up from bed at 3 AM to go slit my wrists and destroy my chest with sharp objects and then almost faint three times afterwards?

I just hate my stupid decisions.

Who wouldn't, if the consequences obtain having to wear long sleeves in a 100 degree weather, or experiencing the pain of binding my chest on the fresh new cuts.

Sometimes I feel like I'm a horrible person, but honestly who doesn't feel like that these days.

Not even talking about the fact that I've started school like three weeks ago and I'm already failing.

I still think about Alex, my boyfriend and supposedly the love of my life I guess.

By "I guess" I mean that I haven't been feeling very much in love recently.

...

Fanfic

,,Yo dude check out this sick pin that I got the other day!" I try to bring Conrads attention to myself as I watch him barely keeping himself from falling off of a ladder, trying to set the lights for our show.

I could honestly watch him all day long like this, it's hilarious.

Our band - Death Queue - is pretty new if I could say that. Three months in and we've already got our first gig in a bar of my friends. Nothing much but better than nothing I guess.

,,Watch out dumbass!" I hear him scream on the top of his lungs seconds before a huge metal box appears right in front of my eyes. I freeze and watch the glass on it's front shatter on the ground, meanwhile hearing Conrad gasp in horror somewhere above my head.

As I slowly realize what that thing that almost fell on me and broke my skull even was, the rest of the band members start emerging from the back stage, as if summoned to humiliate my idiotic friend that just dropped a light box onto my head.

,,What the fuck happened Conrad?!" our bassist Brenn screams into Conrads puppy face. ,,Your dumbass really can't do anything right, can it?!"

,,Hey stop harassing him, it's not his fault that his mother gave him unbelievable inability to work with his hands." I tease him and giggle when he gets down from the ladder to smack my head.

,,Oh you're so clever," he throws his arm around my shoulders. ,,do it yourselves then fuckers."

Brenn gives him the fuck finger and stomps his way back to the backstage so it's just the two of us in the room again.

I admire Conrads troubled face as he examines the broken light box, wishing that I could...

Wait what?

What the FUCK am I thinking?!

Nah man we're friends.

And I have a boyfriend.

So I better shut my brain the fuck up before it thinks of anything more stupid than what it's already thought of.

Yooo writer here✌️

This is totally random but I think I'll try and finish this life fanfic that emerged in my head at 2 AM in the morning.

Share your thoughts in the comments and let me know if you want me to write more

(It is possible that there will be smut in this story)