This boy (Robert Smith x reader)

What I had lost (26)

MAYA'S POV

I'd walked back up to my room after an upsetting call from Robert, luckily Nikki had came home just in the nick of time to spare me from the situation.

I lied about having to pee, I actually just needed to go cry in private so I could actually let my true emotions out.

I sat in the bathroom floor, tears streaming down my cheeks as I tried to wipe them away, but failed as they kept coming.

I needed to get my shit together, it was midday and I was already a wreck.

I just felt so awful though. It's like I'd finally gotten away from everything and then Robert had to remind me of all the unsolved problems I'd tried to leave behind.

I knew deep down I hadn't left them behind, I still had them and they were very much still there to stress me out.

Robert's words wouldn't stop replaying in my head though.

Can't we just try again?

This part Nikki didn't hear, so he probably thought Robert was just being an asshole, but that wasn't the entire case.

I wasn't sure exactly why I got so scared. I think just hearing his voice made me breakdown, I didn't want to face him anymore. I didn't want to hear that voice that kept reminding me of what I had lost.

I glanced up to the counters, seeing the white powder that still sat there untouched.

The urges were coming back to me, I wanted to snort so badly.

The urges always came when bad things happened, and as much as I wanted to slip up again, I knew the drugs would only make it worse.

I picked myself up and dried my tears before i walked back into my bedroom and plopped down onto the bed, letting my face sink down into the soft pillows.

Suddenly, I'd heard a knock at the door.

"Come in." I spoke, my voice muffled by the pillow.

"Hey." He said cooly as he walked in and sat down onto the bed beside my legs.

"You alright?" He asked me softly, grazing his hands along my legs.

"All good." I replied with a raspy voice, my eyes still shut as I took a deep breath in.

"Alright, well, I'm throwing a party here tonight. I just thought I'd go ahead and tell you. So, like if you wanna leave and go somewhere else you can. Also you might wanna lock all your stuff in the attic because sometimes things get crazy." He said jokingly, but also seriously, rolling his eyes.

"Nah, I think I'll stay." I smiled lightly, finally opening my eyes to look up at him.

"Well, sounds good to me. But seriously, I'd put your stuff in the attic if I were you." He spoke with a serious tone.

"Alright, I will later." I chuckled, closing my eyes again.

***

It was around 10:30 P.M. and people were starting to pile in.

The party surprisingly hadn't got too bad yet as I didn't see any drugs or PDA yet.

At the beginning, I pretty much stood awkwardly by myself, but as time went on, I met Heather, Tommy lee's girlfriend, and we hit it off really well.

I hadn't a clue where Nikki went off too, nor did I care too much. I just wanted to enjoy the booze and get my mind off of Robert for a little while.