𝑺𝑴𝑨𝑹𝑻 - 𝐴𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑀𝑖𝑛𝑠𝑢𝑛𝑔 𝑏𝑜𝑜𝑘

‧͙⁺7*･

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‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ᴶ

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"It's all my fault. It's my fault for getting him tired of me." Jisung had woken up but couldn't bring himself to get out of bed. He hugged the blanket very tightly as if the world around him would hurt him and that blanket could be a shield. The bed finally sucked in him. Whereas he was so happy just yesterday. But now, he was experiencing the worst thing. He would rather be angry or sad enough for him to be able to cry. He slowly sat up on the bed and looked around as he stroked his head. ''Fuck this headache.''

His hair was not shiny and the under of his eyes were dark. On a normal day, his glasses would make them more unnoticeable and he would even put some concealer on sometimes, just to look like a regular human being. Did everybody have to go and fix themselves in the mornings? Or was it just Jisung who woke up looking like a corpse just arose from death? His dried cheeks were itchy again and his eyelashes were stinging on his hypersensitized eyes from crying. Sleeping hurt, somehow. And waking up from it hurt even more. Just, why?

He dragged himself out of the warm bed, just to shiver head to toe. With slow steps, he went to the bathroom as he hugged himself, thinking at least taking a hot shower would make him feel a little better. Ignoring the mirror as he knew how he looked made him feel a little better already. He didn't want to feel that pity towards himself today. He turned the water on and threw his clothes around. 

He sat on the bathroom floor, even standing was tiring for him. Until the cold floor of the bathroom got warmed, he held the hot water up above his head. He liked the feeling of warm water running down from his body.

Today was the day for him. He didn't think there was even a worse day from this day. He wanted to say he loved him. Well, he obviously knew that Minho knew that but he wanted to say it was not the way he thought it was. Since he left all of his hope behind, he didn't want to act like himself. He got out of the shower and grabbed his phone. He didn't think about it, because he knew that he would panic. He dressed up and sat on his bed as he let out a sigh. Last time, when Minho didn't come, he just let him be. But now, he had to say something for him to come around for sure. He hummed to himself, ''Let's say it's urgent or important.''  He had to at least try. He pressed the call and waited until a voice came from the other side. "Hi, Sungie. What's up?"

Jisung took a deep breath as he looked around his room. "Hello, Hyung! Can you come to my house today?" Again, there was a silence. Just like last time. Jisung wanted to fill that gap with his swear words. "Umm. I can't Sungie. What's the matter?"

Jisung had to think for a moment. Would it be okay for him to swear now? He would confess but was he ready to open himself up? No. He just wanted a simple closure. Probably...

"It's important. I have something to tell you." Minho hummed from the other side of the call, "Mm, okay. I can't stay for too long but I'll visit you when you get out of school, okay?" Jisung shook his head, even though the other wouldn't see it. "No, I skipped school. You can just come."

He never skipped school before. School was a thing that he looked forward to, knowing he would see Minho at least on the way. Or at least, it would keep him busy for a while. But now, it hurt. There was no need for him to hurt and tire himself. He felt miserable enough just yesterday. And these days, rage was getting a hold of him.

Minho let out a sigh and it almost sounded like a chuckle. Jisung could see a question mark popped on his own head. Why would he even laugh at that? Was skipping school funny? And he just said that it was important too. Did he think Jisung got a lover or something and was gonna tell him about that? Minho wasn't that dumb, was he? Minho continued, "Okay then. I'm on my way."