The UnBroken Circle

Chapter 4

 Chapter4

Sonja slumped on the soft leather backseat of the car and looked out of the window, seeing houses with lights and windows flashing by.

She realised how tired she was, and felt her eyes drooping.

"Hey, stay awake, you could fall into a coma, and I wouldn't notice " Marx said in a sharp voice. "Just let me sleep for a bit, I'm so tired " she moaned "no, you've got to stay awake, just talk to me!" "about what? "Sonja asked her voice still slurred. "well, you could tell me about your life, do you work? Do you have a girlfriend? Did you live in Berlin all your life? "

Sonja started to think, her brain feeling sluggish, how could the small attack have affected her so quickly when there were no visible signs on her body "I don't work, it's complicated" "I always wanted to become a healer in my mother's practice, but she didn't allow me to study medicine, because of my disability. She said when I would be old enough, I could work at her practice anyway, and because my family are well-known healers anyway, I wouldn't need to have any qualification. But that plan shattered of course after my family kicked me out of the circle and my home. The facility for disabled people I am in doesn't think that a disabled person should work in a healing profession and doesn't believe in alternative healing anyway, and I don't want to do anything else. An office job or something similar like my other roommates have would kill me. "Sonja explained. "Wow, that sucks! " Marx said, half in disbelief , half sympathetic.

"So what do you do with your days then?" "Well there is still a lot of chores I have to do for myself or the shared flat, living in a facility for the disabled doesn't mean that they do everything for you, I sometimes wish they would even do more for me, but they always say they don't have the time or I'm just too lazy to do it myself " "That's totally mean, and isn't it their job to have all the time you need to help you? "Marx burst out. "Yeah, you're right, and probably it should but there's nothing I can do. " "Isn't there somewhere you can complain to? ""Well there is the health insurance that pays the facility, but they'll just send somebody who will only listen to the people who work there because they think the inhabitants only complain, because they're either lazy or just don't like the person who is responsible for them " Sonja replied pretty resigned. "Has someone you know ever complained before? ""Yes, a roommate who used to live there called the health insurance, telling them that she had been neglected there leading to health problems. All they did was to ask for the documents reporting the incidents in question, and then told her that they didn't believe her. After the institution found out that she had gone to the health insurance, she was kicked out of the place " .

"Do you know what happened to her afterwards?" Marx said in a shocked voice. "They put her in a psychiatric ward because she had a total breakdown as they tried to pack her things. As far as I know, she still get's treated there. Unfortunately, I lost contact with her " ."Now I understand why you don't wanna do something about these people " Marx replied, sympathetically lightly laying a hand on her uninjured shoulder. "But somebody really should do something about these people and those kinds of institutions " ."I agree, but I just don't have strength and courage enough to fight them " she responded, feeling more awake than before because of the talking.

She hadn't noticed that the scene outside the window had changed from city streets to roads with bigger gardens, and tall trees in between . Sonja wondered if they would be there soon, or where exactly the café was located. "And what about a girlfriend do you have one?" they broke the silence. "No I don't, and I don't really want one the only thing I wish for is friends right now " ."But what about sex or some kind of intimacy, don't you miss that? "„ No, I never really had interest in sex, I like to cuddle, but that I can also do with friends ", Sonja revealed sounding awkward. "Well, I couldn't live with just cuddling "they remarked with a grin. "Do you have a partner then?"She asked at the same time, wondering if they had why this person wasn't here with them. "No, my life circumstances aren't really suited for dating, but I had plenty of sex " ."So are you asexual then or both asexual and aromantic? " Marx wanted to know curiosity sparking in their eyes. "What is that? ""isn't that obvious? It means that you have no sexual and/or romantic desires, or are not compelled to live them, or only under certain circumstances. " they explained "that sounds very interesting. I never knew there was a word for that, so yeah probably I am asexual but I have fallen in love so I'm probably not aromantic "Sonja said feeling revelation and confusion at the same time. "That's alright, you will find out soon enough, it took me years to sort everything out"they assured her. "So when did you find out you were trans-and everything "she asked now equally curious. "When I was 12, I got the feeling that I was not a girl because I had been intimate with another girl for the first time and as she treated me as if we were in a same sex relationship, made me feel very uncomfortable. I didn't have the words at the time it took three years until I found out what exactly I am".