Missing you was like having the air taken out of your lungs.
I had gotten the flu before, I had broken my leg once when I was 7, I had to get stitches on my knee- but no pain could ever compare to this.
Before I met you, I was so lost. So lost.
I thought my life was just going to be a missed opportunity, I was just another useless soul on this world.
But then you were there.
It was like you just appeared. One minute my life was just a series of regrets, but then, you erased everything. My past kept me from my future, but you were the time machine that helped me fix my mistakes. All of a sudden, I realized how much of a mess I was until you. I was surfing out a long, hard wave, and then you were the pure water that swallowed me down and spun me in circles, taking everything I had. It should've been bad, I should've died in your crashing wave, but instead, it's like I wasn't alive until I was drowning within you.
But there has to be a calm to the storm, right? There was only a deafening silence in the eye of the hurricane. A time where I was finally above water, choking and grasping onto all the oxygen that I had left, trying to tread water and try to cough up the water that flooded my lungs. But just as I caught my breath, another wave came.
You never stopped did you?
Every time I would get a hold of myself, you would pull me back down under. I'm not sure if that was a good or bad thing. I'm not sure if all the horrible feelings you gave me were made up by the overwhelming love that I felt as well.
But now, as I face another eye in the storm that is you, clutching onto whatever air I could find and searching for words that wouldn't come to mind as I sobbed so hard, the tears would have created their own sea- I decided that yes, it was worth it.
You were worth it.
