Sticks and Stones

Chapter One

"You're not seriously telling me, Captain, that you don't enjoy an easy job."

Demon mercenary and General of the Inferno demon armies, Caspian, slumped back in his chair, pint in hand as he appreciated the wild atmosphere of the pub around him. For a sociable immortal, Morio's was the place to be. Sure, it was a little on the.... unclean side, but there was no place quite like it.

Surrounded by his mercenary crew, he took a hearty swallow from his pint glass and shrugged. "I'm seriously telling you I don't enjoy an easy job. They're boring. I need something stimulating."

Something to sink my teeth into.

Because Caspian was bored of the forgettable jobs he'd been taking. They were too easy. Too quick. Too simple. He needed something hard. Something with risks and losses. Something he could work into his busy schedule but actually have to try for. Something to keep him going.

Unrealistic, perhaps, but his desire all the same.

"Stimulating!" His mercenary pal and housemate Luis scoffed. "Ha, the General used a big word."

Caspian smirked over his glass. "It means to arouse excitement, Luis."

"Oi you tosser. I know what it means." Luis was the less intelligent member of their band of four. The easiest to get along with—doubtlessly. Only Luis was what some immortals might call the riff raff. He was loud, obnoxious and 110% proud of it. "And I for one love an easy job. In the streets and in the sheets. I get a win and I look cool doing it."

"I'm with Cas," Ebony said. "Easy jobs aren't worth it."

Ebony was the only woman of their group, a serious, violent badass with a sweet tooth for victory.

"Shocker," Luis droned. "All about the glory Ebony sides with Cas."

"We're not all lazy like you," She snapped back.

"I'm not lazy. I'm allergic to effort."

"Because that's a thing."

Luis took the hit like a champ. "Been hearing rumours things aren't going to be easy for much longer."

Ebony quirked a brow. "You catch an STD?"

"The witches have been speaking," Luis drawled. The witches were always speaking. Whether there was ever anything of value to be found in what they said was a mystery. "I've been listening to what they've got to say."

"You listening to witches?" Ebony poked. "Makes a difference."

"Only witches I want to sleep with."

Classic Luis. A whore through and through. Their group had never been able to decide what was wetter—his tongue or his dick.

"Go on then," Cas said. Every now and then entertaining Luis could be rewarding. "What do they say?"

Ebony rolled her eyes, supplying, "Faster Luis. Harder Luis. Have you put it in yet Luis? Do you need help finding the hole Luis? That's my belly button, Luis."

"Fuck off Ebs."

"I'll humour you," Caspian pressed. Though his housemate was rarely ever serious, the few times he was made it worth listening to. "What are the magical folk saying?"

"They reckon the stars are changing."

Ebony hummed, chortling, "Who'd have thought big balls of burning gas could ever change?"

"Not like that," Luis said. "I mean the alignment and shit. And all the signs point to that Oracle witch Evette being back."

Caspian raised an eyebrow.